The Logs
by Momo-GemFarrel
Summary: Harry is 17 and cannot seem cope with the demons from his past. Sirius forces him to get psychiatric assistance to help him move on. But will Harry ever move on even if he tries? AU, Slash!, Some OOCness, SSHP, SBRL, and maybe some other pairings as well.
1. Log 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, although I wish I did…I would have Snape chained to my wall…but alas I only own this plot…

Enjoy!!

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Log 1

"Oh, c'mon Harry, we're almost there! You need to see a doctor to help you get on with your life! Not to mention to help you sleep!" An older man said gruffly, tugging on a young man's arm.

"We've already been to the real doctors! They gave me sleeping pills!" Harry said, glaring angrily at the adult. They made their way into the lobby of a grand building, pushing a button to call the elevator.

The duo walked/dragged into an awaiting elevator, the older man pushing the correct button. As the elevator started to rise Harry huddled into a corner, hugging his knees to his chest. His phobia of enclosed spaces caused his breathing to turn into shallow gasps for air. He twitched as arms encircled him, hugging him protectively, "See? This is what I mean, you need to face your fears and work on moving on in your life. These kinds of doctors will help with that." The man spoke gently and lovingly, rubbing small circles along Harry's back.

"T-Thanks…Sirius." Harry stuttered, glancing up at him with a small smile, "A-Are we there yet? How m-many floors?"

Sirius looked up at the blinking light, "We're here." The doors opened into a small waiting room, chairs were lined up against all the walls while some were set in the middle, along the tops of the wall there were tons of certificates and awards this psychiatrist has gotten over the past years in his "career", Harry scoffed looking away. The receptionist desk was to the right of them, right next to the elevator; Sirius went over, addressing the blonde lady behind the desk,

"Um, excuse me ma'am, we're here for the nine o'clock appointment with the doctor?" Sirius said, smiling happily. The woman consulted her notes and nodded,

"Yes, Dr. Snape will be with you two shortly, this is your first visit I'm presuming?" she said, staring up at Sirius expectantly.

Sirius nodded, motioning over to Harry, "Yeah, we just moved into the area." He said.

The receptionist pulled out a clipboard, smiling and handing it to the black-haired man, "Fill these out then please and return them to me when you're done." Sirius nodded, walking away to the far wall, plopping into a chair with a sigh,

"I hate forms…so many of the damned things…"

Harry sat down next to him, nervousness fluttering around in his stomach, "Um, do you know what this doctor is like?" he asked after a moment's hesitation.

Sirius looked up as he was writing Harry's name in the patient name box, "The last name rings a bell, but I can't seem to remember exactly who it was…plus, he is the best psychiatrist in the Baltimore area...although that isn't saying much since its Baltimore…but anyways! No, I have no idea, 'tis why I am going with you in the first meeting!" Sirius said with a slight hint of amusement in his voice. He looked back down at the paper he was filling out and continued back on his long list of forms to fill out.

Harry sighed, collapsing against the back of his chair. He closed his eyes wearily, thinking, I hate doctors…the whole lot of them can go to hell… Drowsiness swept over him as he sank into the deep feeling of sleep that had eluded him for the past week.

He awoke to the sounds of someone screaming and yelling. He groaned as he felt something wet trail down his cheeks. He stared up into the worried eyes of his godfather and winced, _Shit…I was the one screaming... _Harry sat up quickly from his position on the floor, the nightmare still fresh in his mind; _It was worse this time… _He scanned the room, surveying the damage. The chairs were in disarray and a couple of the awards lay broken on the ground around him. He sighed.

"Harry! Are you okay now?" Sirius said, worry lacing his voice. He helped Harry to his feet and dusted him off, muttering, "What was it about this time?"

Harry looked away, walking over and trying to straighten the chairs, "Don't want to talk about it…it was nothing."

He gasped as Sirius grabbed his wrist, spinning him around, "Don't fucking give me that! I know what I heard and saw Harry, it wasn't 'nothing'. You were screaming for them to stop, to…to…let you go! Your eyes were filled with so much fear; you even lashed out at me!" Harry noticed a bruise forming on his godfather's right jaw, disgust towards himself enveloping him. Sirius ranted on, "Why won't you talk to me about it?!" Sirius yelled, angry tears forming in his eyes, "Do you know how hard it is for me? To live with the fact that it was my entire fault your whole life was and is fucked up? Then, not only that but to not even be able to help you through it all, having to rely on these people I don't even know to help you?" His eyes betrayed all the pain and suffering he was dealing with before going blank, "Just…just forget about it, you are okay right?" he muttered picking up the broken awards.

"I'm okay…" Harry whispered, finishing with the chairs. The nurse walked over cautiously, smiling nervously, "Well then, now that that's over, is there anything I can get for you?"

Harry smiled sheepishly, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to break your stuff…" he said, motioning towards the broken certificates.

The lady chuckled softly, "Not to worry, patients have done a lot worse than this, I assure you, especially in this area of Baltimore." She went back over behind her desk and pulled out a dustpan, walking back over, "Here, sir. I'll sweep the rest up." She said, moving Sirius out of the way. She bent down, sweeping the rest of the glass up and laying the certificates on a nearby chair. She deposited the shards of glass in the trash bin, placing the dustpan back in its proper spot behind her desk; she looked back at Harry, "It's alright…Harry was it? You've done nothing wrong so don't look so forlorn, see, there was this one time where a patient was really fuming after her session so she threw a chair out of the window over there! We were so lucky that there was nobody or nothing down there that could have been damaged; we had to get bullet-proof glass after that one." She chuckled at the memory, "Oh! No, don't get me wrong I find it terrible that it happened but now when you look back on it, it is kind of amusing." She said to him.

Harry nodded convincingly and went to look out the window, surprised to see how high they really were, "Whoa…" He turned to see Sirius sitting down and working on the forms again, his revelation repeating itself in his head, _so he really does blame himself for all this…_ He looked back out of the window when the door to the left of him opened and a young teenager shuffled out, the boy looked tired and worn, he reeked of alcohol as well. The boy glanced at him before nodding to the nurse and leaving the office.

"So, who's next?"

Harry stared at the tall man standing in the doorway from which the teen just vacated. He was tall, with long black hair that reached his shoulders, he had a hooked nose, pale skin, and deep onyx eyes that seemed to be able to bore into your very soul, Harry glared, muttering,

"Me."

The man looked over at him, nodding his head in acknowledgement, "I don't believe we've met, my name is-"

"Oh my fucking god…" Sirius shouted from his place in his chair, staring up at the man with an evil glare, "Snivellus! I never thought I'd see your skinny ass again!" His eyes showed utter loathing for the other man.

Harry noticed the man in front of him tense in rage, "Why the hell are you here? Did you come to make my life a living hell again?"

Harry smirked, _Very professional…I like this doctor…_he thought to himself.

Sirius shook his head, trying to calm down, "No…I'm here for my godson…I didn't recognize your name when I scheduled the appointment, had I known I would have found someone else." He said icily.

Harry walked over to his godfather, tilting his head intrigued, "How do you know him, Siri?"

Sirius grinned, "We went to the same college with Remus, Peter, and James."

With mention of Harry's father his eyes lost all emotion as memories of his childhood bubbled up inside his mind, "Oh. Okay." He turned to the silently fuming psychiatrist, "Can we get this meeting over with?"

The man nodded his head slightly, leading them both into his office. The doctor sat behind his desk, Harry sitting in the armchair across from him. Sirius opted to lean against the closed door, obviously not wanting to be close to the man as possible, "So, as I was saying, my name is Severus Snape, what is yours?"

Harry glared at him, deciding not to say anything. After all, he was still a stupid psychiatrist; he would never trust anyone like him again.

Snape sighed, "Fine, don't tell me. Now, since you obviously don't want to talk, I will have to be forced to talk to that mangy mutt back there…" He turned his attention to Sirius, "I will cut straight to the point, why is he here?"

Sirius sighed, "I am not too sure actually, he won't tell me what's troubling him, but he does have nightmares constantly whenever he tries to sleep, that much is for certain."

Snape nodded slowly, "I should receive his files by tonight or at latest tomorrow, you are seventeen, correct?" He asked Harry, trying to get the boy to at least say something.

Harry stared at him, Sirius answering for him, "Yes…"

Snape made a reference to that in the back of his head, he then went on to explain the procedure in which Harry would be meeting with him and how long he will be staying each session. Soon, Harry and Sirius were back in the lobby saying goodbye to the nurse and walking out into the hall, waiting for the elevator to arrive.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Severus Snape lounged in an armchair in front of a burning fireplace, sipping his herbal tea. He couldn't stop thinking about his new patient, Harry Potter, and his fucking flea-infested godfather. The boy seemed to be a recluse and a formidable challenge in Snape's case; he would actually have to try to get the boy to talk.

Of course, he had to be the son of Snape's most hated person, James Potter, that and being raised by the rest of the Marauder's as well? No wonder the boy had problems. Snape sighed, shaking his head. He got up out of the chair and walked through his spacious loft into his kitchen, refilling his cup of tea. He glanced over at the file on his dining room table. It had arrived that afternoon by special carrier but he had refrained from reading it, the reason unknown to him. His curiosity was at an all time high, what would he find contained in the yellow manila folder? What secrets about the young man's past would he uncover? He shook his head; he really needed to calm down.

He went back, sitting back down in his chair, thinking about the eight years in college that he had to deal with the bane of his existence at the time, James. He remembered all the practical jokes, the constant teasing, the way they almost sabotaged his career with one of their famous pranks. His eyes narrowed in hatred, old feelings bubbling up inside him. He wouldn't let himself be subject to embarrassment and humiliation anymore, he would have his revenge.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Harry groaned as the shouting in the little kitchenette reached an all time high, Sirius shouting,

"I will not allow my godson to be 'helped' by that obnoxious bastard! I don't care if he has the best resume around!" he yelled, banging something on the table.

"You are being totally selfish, Sirius! This is for Harry's benefit! Not yours! He should get the best help he can get, just because we didn't get along during our college years doesn't mean Severus won't do his best to help him!" said Remus, his tone icy cold.

"You're just saying that cause we paid in advanced!" Sirius shouted. There was a long, drawn out pause before a reverberating 'smack' sounded across the apartment.

"Get out of my sight, Sirius, until you grow up. Now." Remus said, walking into the living room towards Harry, "You don't mind getting psychiatric help from Snape right?"

Harry shrugged indifferently, "I don't want the stupid sessions at all." He said, huffing.

Remus sighed, collapsing into the seat next to him, "I know you truly don't want to go through this again but it's getting too bad for us to ignore, you need to get over this and its plain as day that you can't do it by yourself or with us." His voice sounded tired and defeated as he continued, "Please, all that I ask of you is to go there and try Harry, please, if just for me, try." He hugged the younger man tightly, "Now get to bed and try to get some sleep, you got a session tomorrow with Snape and it would be very bad manners to be late."

Harry nodded, picking himself up off the couch and making his way into his bedroom for another bout of nightmares.

Author's Notes:

Well, this is my second Snarry fic so far. I actually got this idea from driving through Baltimore and noticing a worn down psychiatric firm across the street. J.K Rowling's characters really fit this theme well I think. LOL

Review please!! I may post chapters faster if people really show they like it. hint, hint

Momo


	2. Log 2

Dislcaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, I only own this little plot and my imagination.

Enjoy!

Log 2

Snape reclined back in his seat, staring at the silent teen across from him. They had been like this for the past 4 sessions and the silence was starting to grate on Snape's nerves. _Stupid brat doesn't even say a word coming in!_ He really loathed the upcoming sessions if this was all they were going to do for the two hours.

"So, I heard that you just moved here? Where did you live before?" Snape asked, trying to, once again, conjure up even a one-worded conversation.

"Atlanta." Harry mumbled, looking away.

Snape smiled inwardly, "Why did you move?" He saw instantly that it was the wrong question to ask based on how the boy froze like a statue, "Nevermind. So, tell me about yourself." He amended quickly.

Harry glared heatedly at him, "Oh yes I'm breaking down now, is that what you are thinking? Hah. Don't try and bullshit me by pretending that you actually care, I know all about your kind." Harry said, eyes glittering with malice.

Snape's quirked an eyebrow, "Oh? And what, daresay, do you know about… 'our kind'?"

Harry scoffed, "You ask all these personal questions, put on a sweet caring façade, then when we tell you everything you just tell us to get a life and move on. You are only bothering to care because you are in it for the money." said Harry, sneering triumphantly.

Snape's eyes narrowed slightly, contemplating his next move, _The brat's smart, he knows how most psychiatrists work… Well, he hasn't met a psychiatrist like me obviously._ "Hmph, so, how many psychiatrists have you been to if you know so much about us?" Snape said quietly, already knowing the answer.

"Fifteen." Harry replied, getting out of his seat in agitation. He walked over to the window on the far side of the room, staring at the little forms of people walking down the street along the sidewalks, the cars blowing their horns in traffic, and the smog circulating in the air. He sighed, mumbling to himself, "People are so stupid and gullible…"

Snape got up slowly, leaning against the side of his desk, "How so?" he asked.

Harry glanced back at him, before staring out the window again, "Trusting people, letting themselves have friends only to be betrayed by them in the end." His eyes glazed over in memories, Snape forgotten.

Snape jumped at the opportunity, "What happened?" he asked smoothly, coaxing Harry.

"I…I…let them die…I…all I ever did was hurt them…" Harry's voice cracked, tears threatening to spill. He hugged his small frame closely, acting as if he was trying to hold himself together. Snape tilted his head to the side,

"Harry…?"he asked.

The boy looked up at him in shock before looking away in disgust, "Shit…" he mumbled. He turned, running out of the office and into the conjoining hallway.

Snape didn't bother following him, he knew it wouldn't help any, it would only make things worse. He sat back down in his desk, calling up the receptionist via speakers. Her voice filtered through the speaker,

"Yes, Doctor?" she asked cheerfully.

"Do you have the home number of a Harry James Potter on record?" Snape asked, pulling out said boy's file. He flipped through the pages he had read this morning, stopping where he had left off.

"Yes, I do. It's 410-978-4532... Is there something wrong? I saw him run out, he looked terrible I might add." Her voice dropped slightly, "I hope you weren't too hard on him Severus."

Snape chuckled softly to himself, "No…no, Fleur I did nothing of the sort. Now, that is all. Good day." He hung up the phone before picking it up again and dialing the number Fleur gave him. He sat through the dial tone, waiting for someone to pick up. Finally, after the fourth ring a man's voice spoke,

"Hello?" He said.

Snape paused, not recognizing the voice as Sirius's, "Um, does a Harry Potter live at this address?" asked Snape.

"Oh, Severus, nice to see--well, hear you again. It's Remus." Remus laughed slightly, before becoming serious, "What happened? Is something wrong with Harry?"

"No, well, I really don't know. He just ran out of my office around ten minutes ago. I just thought I would let you know before-hand. Also, I was wondering, do you live with Harry?" Snape asked, intrigued.

There was a pause over the phone, "Yes, I do. Sirius and I are his guardians. Why does this matter?" Remus asked cautiously.

"So you would know who his friends were that he had in…Atlanta?" said Snape into the receiver. He found the section in the file from when he was under the care of a Dolores Umbrdige in Atlanta. She had written that he hadn't had any friends that he mentioned in his sessions with her. Had Harry been lying before to satisfy him? Or was this new information that he hadn't told anyone? He _was_ very convincing.

Remus whispered softly into the phone, "He's back, I'll call you later. He can't find me talking to you, at least not yet. Good bye." The phone clicked and went dead.

Snape sighed, deciding to flip through the pages to other sessions Harry had with Umrbridge during the past six months, looking for anything linking Harry to having friends or people he cared about. Still, like before, there was nothing mentioning friends or even acquaintances. He closed the file abruptly when another patient walked in, _This is interesting indeed…_

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Remus watched as Harry shrugged off his jacket and collapsed onto a comforter in the cozy living room. He approached cautiously in case Harry was still in one of his moods from the session, "Harry? What's wrong?" he asked after a lapsed silence.

Harry looked up at him, eyes raw from unshed tears, "I was stupid, I said something stupid." Harry whispered, looking back at the raging fireplace in front of him. He hugged his knees to his chest and rocked slowly in his seat.

Remus sighed, sitting down on one of the chairs nearest him. He leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees, "What did you do?"

Harry rocked faster, staring at the fire intently, "I told him something I never should have told anyone…I mentioned 'them'…" Harry nearly broke down at the look he was getting from Remus, guilt and pain, gods how he hated those emotions, especially when he caused them, "He will find out, that man will find out and I will have to run again…he will try to kill me again…" Harry fingered the scar on his forehead, wincing.

Remus jumped up instantly, kneeling in front of the brunette and grasping his hands tightly in his own, "That man will never get near you, I promise you that. I will protect you with everything that I got before I let that happen…" Remus said, eyes shining in determination, "You will not have to worry about that man any longer."

Harry stared at Remus with a distant look in his eyes, "You do not know him like I do. He will come after me…he will follow me to the ends of this earth if he has to…" Harry gripped his hair tightly between fingertips and let out a soft scream of annoyance, "I hate this! I hate this feeling of weakness! I hate it that I can't do anything about it! I can never bring them back!" A single lone tear trailed down his cheek, "I miss them so much…"

Remus embraced him tightly, "I miss them too Harry, I miss them too."

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

It was around ten o'clock at night when Remus decided to call Severus back. Harry had went to bed an hour ago and Remus didn't expect Harry to get up any time soon, he had begun taking the sleeping pills prescribed to him by his personal doctor.

He went over into the bedroom Sirius and Remus shared, at least, until that night when they had fought. He really missed the dark-haired mutt but was hell bent not to cave first and go find the man. Sirius had taken to coming home late at night, sleeping on the couch and leaving early in the morning before anyone else had woken up. It always worried him how the man could disappear for so long without a trace or inkling to where he was going. He sighed, shaking his head and picking up the cordless they had in the room. He dialed the psychiatrist's number, knowing the man wouldn't have gone home yet since he was always the workaholic type. His hunch was right when Severus's voice filtered through,

"Finally, I was thinking that you had forgotten." Severus's voice deadpanned.

Remus rolled his eyes even though he knew the man couldn't see it, "Whatever, I was busy with Harry. Now what did you want to know? You should have gotten his file. That should have everything you need to know in it." Remus stated.

Severus scoffed, "All I got was his sessions with all his past psychiatrists. Not much use if you ask me. You've been doing this for a while I see." He chuckled softly.

Remus sighed, running his fingers through his hair, "This is not something amusing Severus, and I will not tolerate any of your snide remarks about it. Don't make me regret leaving Harry in your care, that man does not need anything else to go wrong in his life should you betray him." His voice held an icy detachment to it as he said this. He could imagine Severus, contemplating everything he said in that overly active brain of his.

"Do you know what triggered the relapse in his mental health?" Severus finally asked after a long pause.

"I cannot tell you that. It would be considered a betrayal to Harry if he should find out I told you." Remus muttered, "I can, however, get you his police record, that should help considerably."

"How do you expect me to help him if you can't tell me anything?" Severus demanded, annoyance tingeing his voice.

Remus sighed after a couple of minutes, sitting on the edge of the bed, "You remember Lily and James, right?" he asked tiredly.

"How could I forget James? He made my college life hell if you don't remember." Severus sneered.

"Then you must also know that he and Lily died a couple of years ago, correct?" Remus bit out, a feeling of dread clutching his heart.

There was a long pause before a soft 'no' filtered through, "How did this happen?" Severus asked.

"They were murdered by Harry's ex-boyfriend, Severus. Something happened between the two and that bastard decided to get back at him for it by killing his parents." Remus whispered, "He was going to kill Harry afterwards but we were able to save him before-hand, the bastard got away though. That is why we moved around so much, that man will not leave him alone. He found Harry in Atlanta and tried to kill him again but Harry was able to hold him off and get away to safety, which brings us here. Are you satisfied now, Severus? I've told you something that I promised myself that I wouldn't tell anyone ever again." Remus hissed.

"I'm sorry, Remus. I did not know it was that deep of a wound." Severus said with, what did Remus hear? Guilt? "Well, I would still like that police file please if you wouldn't mind giving it to me."

"Fine, Severus. Now, since I told you all this, I expect you to try your damn hardest to help Harry get past this. Please, I truly believe that you may actually be what he needs to move on." Remus admitted, smiling sadly.

"I will try Remus, although this does not mean I forgive you all for what you did to me all those years ago. Do not think for a second that I won't get you back." Severus said, not bothering to hide the threat directed solely to Sirius and himself.

Remus laughed heartily, "I wouldn't dream of it. Goodnight Severus."

"Good evening, Remus." Severus deadpanned before the line went dead.

---------------------------------

Author's Notes:

Well, here's chapter two! I think I did pretty good on this one, I had enough errors when I was done with it to fix (66 to be exact). I hope you all like it. If you have any questions or advice you may e-mail me with them or, REVIEW!

P.S.- Review please! I love getting reviews!

Momo


	3. Log 3

Disclaimer- I do not own Harry Potter, I only own this plot and now, Neil!

Enjoy!

Log 3

Remus stared up at the white ceiling, sighing for the umpteenth time that night. He had lain awake the whole night waiting for his reclusive lover to arrive home. He glanced over at the red digital clock on the nightstand, watching as the time flicked to 3:56 am. He suddenly heard the door to their small apartment open almost silently and close with a small 'swish' in the other room.

He got up to confront his lover when he heard footsteps heading towards his bedroom door. He impulsively dove back into bed, pulling the covers over him and feinting sleep. He heard the door open and a small stream of light flittered across his closed eyes. He heard the scuffling of feet and a chair being moved next to his bed.

Remus nearly gasped when he felt soft lips brush against his own. He felt the longing radiating off his lover as the other man broke the gentle kiss, settling himself into the chair. _Has he been doing this every night without my knowing?_ Remus wondered curiously. Sirius's voice whispered into the darkness,

"You really are mad at me this time, huh? I mean with me being stupid and impulsive all the time, I can see why… Heh, just think if you woke up and caught me doing this, me, Sirius Black, talking to you while you sleep, not having the balls to wake you up and ask for forgiveness? Resorting to sitting in this chair every night and staring at you, wishing to be in your arms?" Sirius laughed sorrowfully, "You would probably laugh at me, wouldn't you? You would probably say how much of a big baby I'm acting…"

Remus inwardly gasped as he heard the tell-tale sobbing of Sirius beside him.Sirius **never** cried, not even when Lily and James died, he had always acted so strong and care-free…

Sniffle. "I do not deserve you…I will never…deserve you…it was my entire fault that we lost Lily and James…I…I don't want to lose you either, I don't know…what I would do if you started to hate me, if you…ever left me…"

Remus felt Sirius's hand caress his cheek, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. Remus battled inwardly with himself, _I should comfort him! But…what if he hates me for eavesdropping like this…I feel like I'm betraying him by listening to this…_ Remus felt Sirius's lips kiss him again faintly and made up his mind. He reached up, grabbing the dark-haired man, pulling him down for a searing kiss.

Sirius's body tensed as he realized what was going on. Remus had been awake…how long…how much had he heard? He lost his train of thought and his worry when Remus ran his tongue over his bottom lip, asking for entrance. Sirius shivered and complied, feeling the warm muscle rub and tease his own. He moaned softly as he climbed on top of the other man, straddling his hips. He ran his fingers through Remus's dirty blonde hair, reveling in the feelings expressed in the kiss.

Remus broke the kiss, gasping for air as he rested his head back against his pillow. He gazed up at the dark, loving eyes that belonged to Sirius and Sirius alone, he sighed,

"I'm sorry…for, you know…listening…" Remus whispered softly, breaking eye-contact and turning his head to the side.

Sirius leaned down, licking at the exposed neck presented to him, before biting down sharply, causing Remus to gasp and writhe. Sirius instantly started licking at the sore spot before pulling away to admire his handiwork. He smiled slightly, "I meant every word of what I said you know, and, I'm sorry for how I acted before…you forgive me?" He asked, nuzzling his head into his lover's neck, inhaling his scent deeply and shuddering as he waited for a response.

Remus sighed, running his fingers through the dark locks above him, thinking. He sighed; he had been won over as soon as Sirius had started talking to him. He laughed softly, "I forgive you, you stupid mutt. Just don't ever do that again…" He wrapped his arms around Sirius's waist, thrusting his hips up, grinning as he felt the man's erection above him, "Now, how about we deal with this other problem, shall we?" He murmured lustily into the man's ear, before pushing the man off of him and pinning him beneath him.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Harry yawned and stretched as he walked into the tiny kitchenette, pulling open the fridge to peer inside. He pulled out a carton of milk, closing the door with his foot. He scratched his stomach as he stifled another yawn. He poured himself a glass and made his way towards his guardian's room.

He opened the door slightly, poking his head inside. The sight in front of him warmed his heart.

Remus was holding Sirius lovingly in his arms as they lay together, flushed against each other. It was obvious from the state of the bed that they had been up all night, probably "making up for lost time". Harry laughed happily, pleased that they had finally gotten back together. In all truth, he felt as if it was his fault they had been split apart. If he hadn't had all those nightmares all the time, then he wouldn't have had to go back into counseling, and if he hadn't of had to start counseling again, they wouldn't have fought over the psychiatrist, and if they hadn't fought over the psychiatrist, then they wouldn't have broken up. All of this revolved around it being Harry's fault. He shook his head slightly, to clear this depressing thought and pulled his head out, closing the door again with a soft 'click'.

He walked back into the kitchen, sitting down at the little wooden table and drinking more of his milk. He groaned as he looked up at the clock, realizing that he had another boring session with Snape in an hour. He gulped down the rest of his milk, putting it in the sink for him to take care of later.

He rushed back into his room and hastily put together an outfit and walking into the bathroom, running the water for a "quick" shower that usually lasted twenty to thirty minutes.

After he had washed up and gotten dressed he had only fifteen minutes left to get to the office on time. He rushed into the living room, pulling on a grey hoodie and his tennis shoes in rapid succession. He ripped a piece of paper, scribbling a quick note to Sirius and Remus about his whereabouts for when they awoke. He went into the kitchen and placed it on the table, placing the salt shaker above it so that it didn't blow away.

He opened the door to the apartment as silently as possible, knowing that Remus had the keenest of senses and he didn't want to wake the man so early in the morning. He took the stairs down to the first floor, waving goodbye to the man behind the desk and taking off at a fast jog down the street.

He stepped into the lobby of the building firm, sighing heavily as he realized that he would have to take the elevators again. He gathered his strength and pushed the button, shivering as the metal doors parted. He took a tentative step into the elevator and pressed the button for the psychiatrist's office, he jumped forward as the door suddenly started to close on him. He huddled into the corner of the elevator again as the machine started to rise. He focused intently on regulating his breathing and keeping his pulse normal, so far he was doing fine.

Halfway during the ride the elevator started shaking horribly, shattering Harry's relative calm. He had started hyperventilating before the elevator had come to a complete stop, and Harry scrambled out as the doors parted far enough for him to squeeze through. He finally got out of the square, metal deathtrap, only to run smack into someone and fall back onto his arse.

He rubbed the front of his head, groaning softly, "I'm sorry…I uh, I wasn't paying attention…" He looked up at the person and groaned louder.Snape glared down at him, obviously perturbed at Harry's smashing entrance, "Well, hello Mr. Potter. I will be back shortly for our session, so make yourself comfortable in the lobby until I return." He motioned towards the lobby as he pressed the button for the elevator again.

As the doors opened up, Harry scrambled to his feet, dusting himself off quickly while scrambling backwards away from the metal deathtrap. He noticed the confused look he was getting from the psychiatrist and rushed even faster into the lobby, collapsing into a seat.

The blonde receptionist looked up from her paperwork, staring worriedly at him, "Are you okay, Harry?" she asked.Harry nodded slowly with his hand on his chest, trying to regulate his breathing again. He smiled slightly after it was in relative control, "Thank you for your concern, miss." He replied gratefully.

The lady looked up again, "Oh, call me Fleur. Miss makes me sound so old..." she giggled softly, "But anyways, you're welcome. Would you like a bottle of water? You look slightly dehydrated." She asked politely.

He jumped up as she leaned down under her desk and pulled out a plastic bottle of water. He smiled his thanks as he took the offered item and drank greedily. After he downed the bottle in two goes he pitched it in the trash can, collapsing back into his seat to wait for the doctor who _still_ hadn't arrived yet.

He sat deep in thought for the next minute or so when a loud voice interrupted his thoughts.

"WHERE IS HE?!" the voice shouted.

Harry shot up out of his seat, staring at the enraged teen in front of him. Harry recognized him as the teen he saw from his first time here. The boy was even worse for wear than the last time; his black hair was matted and strung out in all different direction while his eyes had the look of a crazy man ready to kill. His breath reeked even worse of alcohol and now had the after stench of tobacco.

Harry backed away slowly, shaking his head. The man screamed and lunged at him, tackling him to the ground and shaking him by the collar of his shirt,"I know you know where that traitor is! You're hiding him aren't you? You like him too, don't you?! You want to take him away from me! Well I won't let you, I WON'T LET YOU!" the teen rambled incoherently, shaking him even harder.

Fleur rushed out from behind her desk, trying to pry the young man off of Harry, "Neil, stop this! Harry hasn't done anything to you, let him go!" she pleaded.

This seemed to only enrage the teen even more. He flung her off of him, turning around to face the woman, "How dare you! You are helping the traitor, too? Well, then you must pay as well!" He raised his fist.

Harry reacted instantly and jumped up, grabbing Neil from behind. He tackled the man to the floor and punched a solid blow to his lower jaw.

Neil lashed out with his foot, kicking Harry under the ribs and knocking the air out of him while sending him sprawling onto his back. He climbed on top of Harry, pinning his hands underneath his knees and started punching his face relentlessly.

Blood spurted from his nose as the fists rained down onto his face. The torrent of attacks paused briefly, and Harry tried to counterattack only to have Neil's hands grip his throat tightly, cutting off his air supply.

Harry gasped as breathing became increasingly difficult. He struggled vainly, lashing out with his feet only to hit air. His vision blurred and the room started to spin, his body shutting down from lack of oxygen.

Suddenly, the pressure around his neck dissipated and he could breathe again. He gulped in deep amounts of air, truly grateful for the invisible matter. He heard Snape's voice from across the room but couldn't make out what he was saying, only that from the tone he was using that he was extremely mad.

Harry groaned as someone tried to lift his head up off the ground. He winced as a cold solution was placed against his cut bottom lip, stopping the bleeding and disinfecting it. A bag of ice was placed over his bruised right eye.

He struggled slightly, "Who's…?"he asked softly.

Fleur replied softly, "It's me. Severus is dealing with Neil right now in the other room. Thank you for protecting me, it really means a lot. So, in return for your kindness, I am tending to your wounds." She pressed the napkin more firmly to his lip, making sure the medicine entered all of the cuts.

Harry relaxed and nodded slightly, "It was no problem…really…" He mumbled through the napkin.

The door to Snape's office burst open and Neil was shoved out of the office, Snape following out from behind him, "Get out now, Neil." Snape stated icily, glaring at the black-haired teen.

"B-But Severus! I-I need you, you're mine! You can't ditch me like this!" Neil pleaded, gripping onto the front of the older man's shirt.

Severus gripped the back of his head, detaching him from his person, "No, get out of my sight and don't come back. I will call the police if I see you anywhere near this establishment. Now, goodbye." They had reached the door to the hallway and Snape opened the door, pushing the distressed teen through, before slamming the door shut in his face. He locked the door as the teen started beating on the other side, shouting for him to be let back in.

Snape turned around making his way to Harry who was still strewn out on the floor, "How are you feeling?" He asked, kneeling down next to him.

Harry groaned, "What do you think?" He grit out, feeling suddenly angry towards the other man.

To his surprise the older man chuckled softly, smiling slightly down at him, "Well, I see that you aren't too wounded to realize that you have to stay mad at me." He said. He looked over at Fleur who was wiping the excess blood off of the younger teens face, "Fleur, would you please go and contact Harry's guardians and inform them of this predicament? I would like them to come pick him up in case of another run in. Neil does not give up easily, I'm afraid." said Snape, watching the lady nod her head and get up, handing him the bloody towel. He took it reluctantly, making a face at it.

"I do not have any diseases, Snape." Harry muttered, noticing the man's reaction.

Snape scoffed, pressing the towel to Harry's bleeding nose, "Yeah, sure." he replied.

After another couple of minutes, Harry felt the pounding in his head lessen and he took the towel from the man's grasp and sat up, wavering as the rush of unbalance washed over him. He wobbled slightly before steadying himself. He felt the blood leave his face as he looked at the room. Blood was splattered everywhere, he felt queasy to his stomach as memories bubbled into his mind.  
_  
__Harry was sitting, strapped to a chair as his parents were dragged into the room by two ugly-looking brutes, unconscious and bleeding heavily. He stared in shock as they were tied to two chairs across from him. He screamed and thrashed against his restraints trying to go to his parent's aid, _

"Let me go, Tom. Let me go! I have to help them, they're dying!" He shouted as said man walked into the room.

Tom laughed, walking over to face him, "Of course they're dying, it's their punishment for taking you away from me…" He brushed the back of his hand against Harry's cheek only to have him shy away from his touch. He glared and  
slapped the boy's cheek, smiling at the small whimper that escaped his lips.  


_He stood up slowly, turning his back on Harry to face his new victims. He strode over, pulling out a knife from his pocket, "So, Harry dear. How would you like them to die?" Tom asked, running his thumb across the blade. _

He heard the boy start to struggle again and laughed, "So you want them to suffer? I could kill them slowly, it is always exhilarating to watch the light fade from their eyes…"

"Don't! They don't deserve to die, this is just between you and me, you and me Tom. Kill me and let them go!" Harry screamed.

Tom sighed and shook his head, "Sorry Harry, since you won't decide, I'll just do the deciding for you." He pulled on Lily's hair, pressing the blade to her throat. He glanced back at Harry who now had his eyes firmly shut and face turned away, "Oh Harry, I'm doing this all for you and you don't even have the courtesy to watch?" He nodded his head over to one of the goons standing off to the corner of the room.

The man walked over, gripping the boy's chin and forcing his eyelids open.

Tom grinned and turned his attention back to the boy's mother, pressing the blade harder against her exposed skin, breaking it. Blood trickled down her neck and some dripped onto the floor, "Ready Harry? They're going to die for you."  
_  
__Tom raised the blade, before slashing downwards…_

Harry was jarred out of the memory as intense pain erupted on the side of his cheek. He stared, wide-eyed at Snape who was looming over him with an inquiring/worried look on his face, "Are you alright now?" he asked tenderly.

Harry nodded slowly, rubbing his cheek dimly, "Did you slap me?" he asked.

"Yes, you were unresponsive to everything else. I was calling your name and shaking you but you wouldn't come out of whatever memory you were obviously remembering." Snape stated, extending his hand towards the man.

Harry accepted , being pulled shakily to his feet. He struggled to maintain his balance as he walked over to one of the clean chairs, collapsing down into it while rubbing the bridge of his nose.

The door to the office burst open as two extremely pissed guardians rushed in.

"WHERE THE HELL IS THE MAN THAT HURT MY GODSON?!" Sirius shouted, looking around the office. When he didn't find his intended target, he lunged at the next best thing, Snape, "WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU WHEN HARRY WAS BEING ATTACKED?! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT HIM, YOU BASTARD!" He lunged at the man only to be stopped by two strong arms encircling his waist and holding him back.

"Sirius! You need to calm down! It's not Severus's fault! You should be more worried about Harry!" Remus said into his ear, effectively calming the man down.

Sirius broke away, rushing over to kneel in front of his godson, checking the wounds that lined his face. He growled deep in his throat, faintly running his fingers over the large welt on Harry's left temple, "I'm so sorry Harry, I should have come with you, I would have been able to prevent this." Sirius muttered, defeated.

Harry shook his head, hugging the dark-haired man tightly, "It wasn't your fault, it was no one's really, he just got the upper hand was all. I would have beaten him if he hadn't of pinned my hands." Harry reassured solemnly.

Sirius nodded slowly and backed away so Remus could look him over as well. Even though the other man didn't show it, Sirius could tell that the man was even more enraged then he was, although he did better to hide it. His eyes held back all emotions except for worry which was shining through brightly.

Snape walked over to stand next his secretary, watching the exchange in front of him. He watched in silence as he mulled over the new information he had gleaned from Harry while he was in the trance.

Harry had been repeating a person's name over and over as if in a mantra. Tom. That much he had understood from the random muttering. He sighed, he had been seeing the young man for over a week and the only information he had obtained was from Remus and when the patient was lost in memories and muttering to himself. He shook his head, he needed to try harder to get the man to trust him. Hopefully this fiasco helped with that. I mean, what else is the best way to gain trust than to save the person's life?

He snapped out of his thoughts when he realized that Remus was trying to tell him something, "Um, what?"

Remus sighed and rolled his eyes, "I wanted to express my gratitude for saving Harry. He filled us in on what happened." He then looked over at Fleur, "And I would like to thank you for tending to his wounds afterwards, you did a very good job from what I could tell." He bowed his head slightly in respect before turning around to his two charges, "Alright you two, let's go visit the doctor's again and get Harry cleaned up enough to actually be able to look at him without gagging." He stated, chuckling slightly.

Harry groaned, "I don't want to go to those people, they make me feel sick every time they touch me." He muttered darkly.

Remus shook his head, patting him on the back, "Sorry mate, you're going and that's final." He said firmly.

Sirius walked over to Snape while the other two men started to bicker back and forth. He stared at Snape for a long while before muttering a chaste "Thank you" and scurrying away to push the two men out of the office.

Snape stared after him, mouth gaping slightly, _Well, what do you know, hell does freeze over…_ He thought, amused.

After the trio had left his office he turned on his heel and headed back into his office, shouting back towards his secretary, "Fleur! I want this all cleaned and tidied up by tomorrow!" He closed the door to his office.

Fleur groaned, throwing her hands in the air, "Men!" she shouted.

----------------------------------------

TBC

Author's Notes:

Alrighty then, here's the 3rd chapter of The Logs! I felt our lovely mutt couple hadn't gotten enough justice in this story so yeah, here's their nice and mushy part, lol.

Well, review and tell me what you think, please! I love reviews, they are my motivation!

Oh, and P.S.- Thanks to all the people who have reviewed my story, I continue writing because of you people!

Momo


	4. Log 4

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, only the twisted ideas in my head!

Otherwise, Enjoy!

--------------------------------------------

Chapter 4

Harry awoke that morning to a loud banging on the front door. He sat up groggily in his bed, looking over at the clock on his nightstand. He groaned, realizing that it was only 10:00 in the morning. Harry climbed out of bed, making his way into the living room to answer the door. He figured it was either Sirius or Remus since they had to go out that morning for groceries; what he did not expect, though, was to see Snape standing at the front door. Harry gaped slightly, "Uh…"

Snape quirked his lips. "Well, tactful as ever I see?" He full out grinned at the glare he got in return.

"What do you want?" Harry asked, slightly irked by the man's presence.

Snape scoffed, "Such manners, have I come at a bad time?" he asked, looking over the man's head and into the apartment.

Harry grumbled, "I was asleep."

Snape let a soft 'oh' escape his lips, "I'm sorry. May I still come in?" he questioned.

Harry shrugged his shoulders, "Whatever." He opened the door wider, moving back enough to let the man in before closing and locking the door. Harry motioned for Severus to get comfortable on the couch, "Would you like me to get you anything?" he asked out of common courtesy, even though he didn't trust the man.

Severus shook his head in the negative before looking around in the living room, "Where are Remus and the mutt?" he asked out of curiosity.

Harry looked over from where he was picking up loose articles of stuff on the floor, trying to clean the place up a little, "They went shopping for groceries, they should be back soon." He said, plopping down in an armchair while stifling a yawn.

They sat there for a while, an awkward silence falling over them. Harry shifted nervously, the silence making him antsy. He cleared his throat, "So…uh, what did you need to come here for?" he inquired.

"I didn't come here for any specific reason; I just wanted to make sure you were healing properly." Snape admitted.

Harry quirked a brow at the statement, "Oh really?" he asked snidely.

Snape leaned back on the couch, crossing his arms, "You don't like me very much do you?"

Harry snorted, "Took you this long to realize it? You're losing your touch, _doctor_." he said, annoyance evident in his voice.

Another knock sounded at the door, Harry rising to go answer it again. He pulled it open to find a grinning pair of godfathers. He smiled as he moved aside, opening the door wider to let the duo inside.

Snape stood up, making his presence known to the two males, "Good morning." he muttered.

Sirius stopped in his tracks, staring at Snape as if he had just risen out of the floor, "W-What are you doing here?" he accused, glancing back at Harry, "How long has he been here?"

Harry shrugged, "Fifteen minutes at most, he just came by to check up on me supposedly."

Remus nodded, "Well then, let's treat him nicely you two. Would you like anything to drink, Severus? I just bought some instant coffee if you'd like." he asked.

Snape went to say something but was cut off when Sirius shouted, "But you bought that for me!"

Remus sighed and rolled his eyes, "Jealous much?" he joked.

Sirius looked abhorred, "Me? Jealous of him?" he asked incredulously. He pouted when Remus started to laugh, "It's not funny Remy!" He crossed his arms defiantly.

Remus chuckled and patted his head, "I'll buy you some more later." He turned his attention back to Severus, "So, how do you like your coffee?" he questioned.

Severus sighed, "Two teaspoons of sugar and a little bit of creamer if you have any." he asked.

Remus nodded and motioned for Sirius to bring the groceries into the kitchen. Harry watched them leave and smiled slightly.

"They really love each other, huh?"

Harry looked over and Snape surprised, "Yeah, they really do." he admitted softly. His eyes softened as he watched the two cuddle while waiting for the coffee to brew. He looked away and sat back down in his chair, Snape following suit. Harry leaned forward in his chair, resting his elbows on his knees and letting his head fall forward, "Why are you here, Snape? And, tell me the truth this time." Harry demanded, looking through his brown locks over at him.

Snape sighed, reclining in his seat, "Is it really hard to believe that I care about your well being?" he insisted, while staring straight at him.

Harry instantly tensed, "Just shut up…" he muttered while looking away.

Snape leaned forward, "No, I am not going to "shut up"! If I shut up every time you don't like where a conversation is going we will never get anywhere!" he stated icily.

"We are never _going_ to get anywhere, so just shut up and stay out of my life!" he shouted, jumping up and out of his chair.

Snape stared up at him, a calculating look in his gaze, "Don't come to anymore sessions until you are ready to talk to me about your problems." He stood up making his way to the door, "Good day." He made his exit.

Harry glared daggers at the door, clenching his fist tightly to try to suppress his rage and keep from breaking anything.

Sirius and Remus walked into the living room to find an enraged Harry, they looked at each other worriedly. The two godfathers walked over, Sirius reaching out to touch his shoulder, "Harry…what's wrong?" he asked softly.

Harry shirked away from his touch, walking away, "I'm going to bed, don't bug me." They heard a door slam.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

A couple weeks passed and Harry still had not returned to any of his sessions. He was currently out shopping for new art supplies. There had been a sudden urge to draw inside him ever since the black-haired psychiatrist had visited all those weeks ago. He had not drawn anything for over two years, losing the urge ever since he started dating…_him_.

He clenched his fists and breathed in and out deeply, trying to calm himself. He opened his eyes and looked around for the final item on his list. Pens. He was going to be there for a while. He was increasingly meticulous about the kind of pens he drew with; if the pens didn't feel right to him then they were useless.

Harry stood in front of the vast aisle of pens, staring at the many different brands and thicknesses. He sighed, going to reach for one then pulling his hand back and shaking his head. It was like this for over a half-an-hour, going through practically the entire aisle and still not finding what he was looking for. He reached the end of the aisle and turned to leave when a small pack of pens at the end of a rack all the way in the back caught his eye. He squinted closely and reached in, groaning as the pens were just out of his reach. He stretched his arm as long as it could go, flicking the package with his fingertip, bringing it closer to him. He smiled victoriously as his hand grasped the tiny pack of pens.

He pulled them out and smiled, they were exactly what he needed. He did a very small and almost unnoticeable happy dance before walking over to the cash register to pay. As he was putting his items on the conveyor belt, he noticed a streak of black hair enter the tiny craft store. He nearly choked as he realized that it was Snape,

_That man is fucking following me! There is no way this is coincidence!_ Harry thought angrily.

He paid for his items and walked back around the cashier aisle, following the older man, _Time to see what he__'__s up to for a change__…_

Harry walked slowly, ducking every time Snape looked behind him; _He__'__s __paranoid__ today__…_

Snape turned down one of the aisle towards the far back corner of the store. Harry following a few feet behind him. He went to turn the aisle but pulled back sharply as he realized Snape had stopped. He peeked his head out around the side, noticing a younger man appear from another aisle, surprising the psychiatrist by wrapping his arms possessively around him, embracing him tightly from behind.

Harry's eyes widened as Snape relaxed into the hug, smiling, "Is there any particular reason we had to meet in the back of an art and craft store?" Snape questioned, turning around to face his companion.

Said man chuckled deeply, running his fingers through Snape's black locks, "No reason, now, let's put those lips to better use, eh?" he murmured, pulling Snape's head down for a searing kiss.

Harry blushed madly, wanting to look away but his body would not move. He watched as the kiss got more passionate, Snape pressing the younger man against the wall, his hands exploring underneath the fabric of his lover's shirt.

The young man broke the kiss, throwing his head back to moan softly, obviously enjoying the ministrations.

The moan alerted Harry to his current situation and he shuffled back quietly trying not to reveal himself. He backed up, knocking over a bin filled with markers. He flinched at how loud the sound was. Harry looked up over at the duo to meet a pair of piercing black eyes.

Snape glared heatedly at the spy, eyes widening as he realized who it was, "Potter…?"

Harry tensed and picked up his bags, running down the aisles and towards the exit of the store. He heard footsteps behind him and Snape calling his name again, "Potter!"

He rushed past the cashiers and outside onto the sidewalk. He looked both directions before running through traffic to get to the other side of the road. Cars honked at him as he crossed. He froze and stepped back as a car suddenly braked a few millimeters from his shins, blaring it's horn at him. He stared up at the driver as he motioned with his hands to get out of the way. Harry chanced a glance back at the store and paled as he saw Snape staring at him with…fear in his eyes? He glared at him before moving out of the cars' way and stepping onto the safety of the opposing sidewalk. People rushed over to him to see if he was harmed, Harry shrugging them off as he practically ran back to the apartment.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Harry collapsed against the inside of the door, breathing harshly as his body recuperated from the ordeal; _I nearly was run over!__ I could have died!_ He thought harshly, mentally kicking himself for his stupidity. He replayed the look of fear and worry on Snape's face when he was nearly run over, an uneasy feeling squirm its way into his gut…_Maybe he cares after all?_ Harry scowled slightly, _probably not__…_

He got up off the floor after his body's trembling had died down to minor twitches here and there. He brought his supplies into his bedroom and dumped them onto his bed, mentally cursing himself as he realized that he had left a bag behind in his rush to get out of the store. He sighed; he would have to go back tomorrow to get it.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Harry walked into the craft store, instantly paling as everyone stopped to look at him,

_I guess they still remember yesterday…_ He hid his face behind his hand and rushed over to Customer Service counter. A young brunette woman smiled slightly at him,

"How may I help you?" she asked.

Harry shifted nervously, "Hello, my name is Harry Potter, yesterday I, um, left one of my bags here and I was wondering if you had it? I have the receipt with me if you need it."

The brown-haired woman thought for a moment, before realization flashed across her face, "Oh!" she started looking through piles of papers, "Hold on…he left a note…ah, here it is!" She pulled out a small yellow sticky note, handing it to him, "An older man with black hair came over yesterday saying that he had found one of your bags and asked me to give that note to you." She explained at his confused look.

He read the note, groaning, _He__ is__ making me go to his fucking apartment to pick it up?! Why the hell couldn__'__t he leave it here for them to give me?!_ He smiled sadly at the woman before making his exit. He read the note, scanning the address again before walking down the sidewalk.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

_702...703...704._

Harry steeled himself before knocking swiftly on the door. He waited a couple of minutes, raising his hand again to knock when the door suddenly burst open. An exasperated psychiatrist standing at the door,

"Finally, I was beginning to think that you wouldn't show up." he stated.

Harry glared at him, shoving his way past and into the suite, "Where's my stuff so that I can go?" Harry growled, feeling terribly exposed in his new surroundings. It wasn't enough that he had to walk four miles to get here but to have the man piss him off as soon as he'd arrived was irksome in itself.

Snape scowled slightly, doing his best not to snap at the man. He closed the door and walked into the kitchen shouting out, "Would you like anything to drink?"

Harry groaned, "I frickin' _told _you already, give me my stuff so I can go!" he shouted.

Snape walked back out with two small cups of herbal tea, "Not until we talk about some things…,"he stated.

Harry sighed and collapsed tiredly into a chair, "Well, hurry up and make this quick. I need to be back before Remus and Sirius get home and notice me missing." he grumbled.

Snape nodded his understanding, sitting down across from him. He handed Harry a cup of tea who begrudgingly accepted. Snape sipped at his cup, "So, about yesterday-"

Harry interrupted, "What happened yesterday?" he asked, smirking inwardly as he decided to play dumb.

Snape's eyes narrowed, "You know full well what happened yesterday…," he hissed.

Harry looked up, tapping his chin with his finger, "Hmm…let's see; oh, now I remember. I caught you snogging with some man in the back of an arts and crafts store!"

Snape winced and closed his eyes, "Yes, I ask that you don't mention what you saw to anyone. It is imperative that this does not become public knowledge." He opened his eyes, staring at Harry dead on, "Please, Potter."

Harry stared at him confused, "Why would it matter?" he asked.

Snape shook his head, "It doesn't matter why, just promise me that you won't tell!" he shouted, his cool demeanor crumbling slowly. He ran his hand through his hair, "I…I do not want to have to deal with the press right now, I want to have a life to myself, I want to be able to have a love-life without the paparazzi standing at my window watching…" He whispered icily.

Harry felt something stir within his chest and looked away, "I'll keep your secret Snape, don't worry. I never planned to tell anyone anyways. But, seriously, would the press actually care that much about one psychiatrist?" he asked.

Snape stood up, facing away from him, "I…I don't have the best of records…" he muttered.

Harry tilted his head to the side, "You mean police record?"

Snape nodded, his face reflecting all of his hidden pain, "The press would do anything to discredit me, I would lose my job…everything." he said sadly.

Harry got up suddenly, "Where's my stuff, Snape?"

Snape turned his head to look at him, his eyes hardening, "In the kitchen on the counter, next to the sink." he said, watching as the young brunette ran into the kitchen. He had never told anyone about that before and all the stupid brat did was blow him off as if it was nothing! Snape scowled and sat back down in his chair, downing the rest of his tea in one swing. He grabbed Harry's abandoned cup and walked into the kitchen.

Snape stopped and stared when he found Harry huddled in the corner of his kitchen, sketching on the large drawing pad he had left behind with his new pack of pens. His face was tense in concentration and Snape felt compelled to leave him alone. He set the two cups on the table and quickly left the room to give the younger man his space.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Harry sighed contently and closed the drawing pad, smiling at his accomplishment. When he saw the older man's face with so much emotion he could not contain himself, he had to put it down on paper. Harry stretched out his legs and groaned as blood surged through his veins, _I must have been here a while__…_ He reached down and rubbed his calves stimulating the blood flow.

When the tingling died down in his legs he got up shakily, making his way out of the kitchen and into the spacious living room. Now that he was not in a hurry to leave, he actually took the time to take in his surroundings. This place was HUGE for an apartment. He walked down the hallway to the left of the kitchen finding a spare guest room, small full bathroom, and a hall closet.

In the hallway to the right of the kitchen were the master bedroom and the master bath. Harry stared in shock at the grandeur of the bedroom. There was a King-sized bed right in the middle of the room covered in satin sheets with two dark oak night stands on both sides, a dark oak bookshelf lined the whole right wall and to the left was a door that Harry bet was Snape's clothing closet. Everything in the room screamed expensive, even the tan carpeting that filled the room.

Harry flinched as a voice whispered in his ear, "Enjoying the view?" He twirled around, glaring at a grinning Snape,

"Don't do that!" Harry shouted, clutching his chest. Snape smirked even wider,

"Well, then don't go snooping around people living quarters while their away." Snape stated. He held up a large brown bag, "You hungry? I got Chinese."

Harry went to deny being hungry but his stomach beat him to it by rumbling loudly. He blushed slightly, "Well, I'll have a little but then I really have to go, Sirius and Remus are probably freaking out by now." Harry muttered.

The psychiatrist chuckled, "I called them already to let them know where you were, so don't worry about that and take your time. It would really be unfortunate for you to choke on your food."

Harry grumbled something inaudible before heading out back into the kitchen, "What time is it?" he asked.

Snape shifted the large bag, looking at his watch, "It's around 7:50 from what I can tell."

Harry stopped and whirled around, "What?! I got here around 4:00! I couldn't have been drawing for that long!" He admonished.

Snape laughed. "You've been in my kitchen for that long I assure you. You were muttering to yourself the whole time. Now, if you don't mind I would like to eat my food before midnight." he declared, moving past the man again and into the kitchen, setting the food onto the small table. Snape walked over to the cupboards, pulling out two plastic plates and utensils, setting them onto the table. He opened the refrigerator peering inside, "What do you want to drink? I got tea, milk, water, and coke."

Harry sat down in a chair pulling out the tiny white containers, "Milk please." he stated. He set the food in a small pile on the center of the table.

Snape sat down with their drinks, him choosing to have tea while placing Harry's milk near him. They each filled their plates, eating in relative silence. Harry kept glancing up at the man across from him, wondering if all of this was just a set-up to get him to trust him. He looked off to the side to his abandoned drawing pad on the counter and sighed.

Snape looked up from his food, "What's wrong?" he asked softly.

Harry got up and grabbed his drawing pad, flipping it open to the first page before sitting back down, "No-nothing. I just wanted to check something…" he whispered, staring at the forlorn face staring up at him on the page, _Maybe….I could trust him? He seems human enough. _He frowned, _but what if he betrays me like Umbridge did…? _He sighed, looking up at the concerned expression of his psychiatrist, staring at him determinedly, _He has no reason to lie to me, and if he betrays me then I could just out him to the world…_He came to a decision after another ten minutes of debating, feeling sick to his stomach that he was going to go through with this again.

He set the notebook on the ground before twirling the noodles on his plate with his fork, "He killed my parents…" He mumbled after a lapsed silence.

Snape's eyes widened slightly, realizing what the man in front of him was trying to do. He remained silent, knowing that he should not interrupt. Harry continued on, "He tied me to a chair and made me watch…he wanted me to watch as he took their lives…," he shuddered and wrapped his arms around himself, "The blood…my god, there was so much blood…" Tears started to flow from his eyes, "He…he slit my dad's throat, he died…he died pretty quickly…but my mom, she was so stupid! She had to go and fight back! It was much more painful for her…he tortured her; she was alive for around three hours before he finally tired with her. He stabbed her in the chest ten times, out of spite for ruining our 'perfect love'. The last thing she said to me…the last thing she said to me was 'I love you'; 'I _fucking_ love you'! How could she love me when it was my entire fault they were there in the first place?!" Harry slammed his fist on the table, shaking terribly as tears steamed from his eyes, "It was all my fault…,"he ran his fingers through his hair, gripping it tightly as he huddled on the chair, "It's always my damn fault…" he hissed. Harry quieted down, rocking slowly in the chair while trying to stifle his tears. He hadn't meant to go so far, he had not wanted to let Snape so far inside his demented and tortured soul. Harry had never even told Sirius and Remus this.

Harry flinched as arms encircled him, embracing him tightly. He stared at Snape with wide eyes as he began mumbling nonsense into his ear while massaging the back of his neck. Harry tried to pull away but the arms tightened around him, pulling him closer to the warm body beside him. He couldn't contain the tears any longer and cried unashamed on the shoulder presented to him.

Snape sighed and brought his hand down, rubbing small circles in the small of Harry's back. He hadn't expected this, he wasn't prepared for the information he had received tonight. He didn't know how to respond, and that unnerved him.

Snape didn't know how long he knelt there, hugging the man but was snapped out of his reverie as he realized that the younger man had fallen asleep against him, arms hanging loosely around him. He shook his head and chuckled softly, maneuvering his hands to pick Harry up bridal style. He froze as the younger man shifted in his arms, sighing as he stilled.

Snape made his way into his guest room, placing the man gently on the bed and covering him with the spare blanket at the foot of the bed. The man stirred and green eyes stared groggily up at him, "…Snape?"

Snape smiled almost unnoticeably and hushed him, "Sleep Potter, you need to rest. I'll call your godfathers, so go to sleep, sleep…" Snape murmured almost soothingly, Harry already complying to his command.

After Snape made sure he was sleeping peacefully he walked out and shut the door quietly, making his way back into his kitchen. He walked over and picked up his cordless phone, speed dialing the mutt and Remus.

Snape paced around his kitchen silently, utterly annoyed at how long it takes for the two godfathers to pick up their phone. He silently thanked whatever god there was when Remus picked up the phone, "Hello? Severus? Has something happened to Harry?!" he insinuated.

Snape smirked as he heard the death threats from Sirius in the background, "No, no, Remus. Nothing has happened to your precious godson. We actually had a break-through, but he wore himself out and is asleep in my guest room. He can stay the night but you will have to pick him up early tomorrow." he stated simply, leaning against the counter. His eyes strayed over the tiled floor, staring at Harry's dejected drawing pad. He leaned up off the counter and walked over, half-listening as Remus repeated what he had said to the annoying mutt.

He picked up the pad, a sudden curiosity to look inside forming in his stomach. Snape stared at it, debating the pros and cons of looking inside. Remus interrupted, "When would you like us to come by to pick him up?"

Snape's eyes widened slightly in confusion, "Huh?" he stated simply, totally engrossed in his thoughts that he totally missed what the man had said.

Remus sighed, repeating himself, "When would you like us to pick Harry up tomorrow?"

Snape shifted the phone to his shoulder, opening the pad to the first page, "Oh, well anytime before…" he faded off, staring in shock at the picture on the page. _He…He drew me…_ He ran his fingertips faintly down the page, tracing every line with his fingers, He felt emotions stir in his chest, feeling all the emotions Harry had captured in the picture radiate into his soul. He shook it off quickly slamming the pad shut and dropping it onto the counter, picking up quickly where he had left off, "Anytime before 10:00 would be preferable, now I need to get some work done, so good evening Remus." he said.

He could sense Remus's curiosity at the recent pause but all he said was, "Good night, Severus."

---------------------------------------

TBC

Author's Notes:

Well here's Chapter 4 of The Logs! I really need to update my stories faster, I swear there aren't enough hours in the day…Anyways I really liked writing this chapter, although all the editing I did to it. It was so annoying, lol. There wasn't a lot of Sirius or Remus in this chapter…well don't worry they were just in the background "making up for lost time".

Sirius: Hey! We were not!

Momo: Uh-huh, I got photos to prove it! -smiles evilly- I'm gonna sell them to all those fan girls out there! I'll never be a poor yaoi-addict ever again!

Sirius: You are so mean to us! -looks around for Remus- Remy! She's being mean to me again!

Remus: -yawns- What's wrong now?

Sirius: -points at Momo accusingly- She's going to sell pictures of us to all of those scary stalker fan girls out there! Stop her!

Momo: Yeah! I'll never be poor again!

Remus: -sighs- Why do I even bother to deal with you idiots?

Momo and Sirius: You know you couldn't live without me!

Remus: Believe what you want, I'm just here for the yaoi scenes.

Sirius: -pales- You can't possibly want Harry to sleep with that greasy ass snit?! No, omg the horror! -faints from the mental images-

Remus: -walks over, picking him up off the ground- Now you see what you did?

Momo: Hey, you are the one that went there, it wasn't me. Now, about those photos…

Remus: I don't care what you do with them, I just want good yaoi in return

Momo: -grins- Deal!

Well, I really need to go to bed now…I'm delusional…bye until the next chapter!

MOMO

P.S- REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW!!


	5. Log 5

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, only the plot!

Thank yous to all the reviewers who read and commented on my story! I really appreciate it! This is for you guys!

Enjoy!

Edit: I added the last paragraph after posting this. I didn't realize that it wasn't on here before, sorry!!

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Chapter 5

Snape awoke to the sound of screaming coming from somewhere outside his bedroom. He scrambled quickly out of his bed, throwing on a pair of old sweatpants and rushing out into the hall. The older man located the noise, realizing that it was coming from the guest bedroom. He barged into the room, eyes widening as he saw Harry thrashing around on the bed with tears streaming down his eyes. He sprinted over to the side of the bed, reaching out to shake the boy roughly, "Potter, potter, wake up!" he shouted, not getting any response in return.

Harry continued to struggle valiantly, even going as far as to lash out at Snape with his fist, catching him on his lower jaw. Snape hissed as pain lanced up his cheek. He climbed on top of the distressed teen, pinning his hands and legs, "Harry!" he shouted once again.

Crazed emerald eyes opened wide, a scream dying down in his throat, "No…don't do it, don't touch me!" he begged. Snape frowned as Harry tried to buck the older man off in vain, tears continuing to stream down his face, "Please, Tom, please…" he whispered.

Snape leaned down, whispering comfortingly, "Harry…it's me, look at me, it's Severus, not Tom, Severus." Harry seemed to ignore him, continuing on his rant. Snape risked releasing one of Harry's hands, to grip his chin forcefully, but not enough to cause him pain, "Look. At. Me." He stated demandingly, thoroughly worried that the man wouldn't come out of his nightmare.

Harry's wide eyes fixated themselves to his face, focusing slightly, "Sn…ape?" he asked timidly. He squinted his eyes slightly, trying to make out the hazy blob above him, "…Glasses?" he questioned.

Snape looked around on the bed, spotting them halfway underneath his pillow, "Here." He placed them in front of his face, releasing Harry's other hand so that he could put them on, "How are you feeling?"

Harry fixed his glasses onto his face and looked away, glaring at the wall, "Don't worry about it." He mumbled.

Snape sighed, "You were screaming Harry. I need to worry about it." He stated.

Harry sighed, closing his eyes from the shame, "I had a dream about him, about Tom. He…he was going to…" He paused slightly; taking in a shuttering breath, "He was going to rape me…" he said the last part in a whisper.

Snape climbed off him slowly, moving to sit on the edge of the bed. He stared at the far wall, "Did he ever rape you in real life, Harry?" he questioned softly, feeling guilty to even have to ask the question. Harry didn't answer him. Snape closed his eyes and clenched his jaw tightly, gritting out, "Does Remus and Sirius know?"

Harry shot up out of the bed, a terrified look in his eyes, "You can't tell them, please, promise me that you won't tell them!" he begged.

Snape glanced back at him, smiling sadly, "I promise."

Harry calmed down instantly, flopping back onto the bed, "I haven't had nightmares for a while now. I guess it's because I've been taking all those sleeping pills." He muttered.

Snape ran a hand through his hair, "Well, if you don't need anything else then I guess I'll head back to bed now." He got up, starting to make his way over to the door when a hand reached out and grabbed him. Snape looked back questioningly.

Harry blushed brightly, glancing down at his sheets. He mumbled something softly and hastily, causing Snape to sigh in annoyance, "You need to speak louder if you expect me to hear you at all." He stated simply.

Harry shook his head and released his grip on the older man's arm. He looked away and laid back down, covering himself up with the sheets, "Never mind, it's nothing. Sorry to disturb you." He murmured softly.

Snape shook his head, walking to the door, "Don't worry about it, Potter. It's quite alright." He exited the room, shutting the door behind him.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Harry woke up again that night to another nightmare. He sat up in bed breathing harshly as flashes of the nightmare replayed itself in his mind. He shivered slightly and climbed out of bed, making his way into the kitchen.

Harry opened the door to the refrigerator, peering inside for something to drink. He pulled out the carton of milk, setting it on the counter while pulling out a glass from the cupboard. Harry poured himself a drink, putting the milk away and settling himself down in a chair. He sipped at his milk, closing his eyes as he tried to relax.

Harry finished his drink, already feeling immensely better than when he had entered the kitchen. He put the glass in the sink, making his way out into the living room. Harry paused as he tried to figure out what he should do now, _I don't want to go back to bed…I'll just have nightmares…_

He glanced over at Snape's bedroom door, wondering if the man was still asleep. Harry made his way over to the door, opening the door quietly to peek inside. He blushed slightly as he remembered what he had almost asked earlier. It was proven that if Harry was sleeping near someone he trusted that he wouldn't have any nightmares, although he only asked to on very rare occasions when the nightmares were too much for him to handle on his own. Harry had wanted to ask Snape if he could stay in the same room with him but his pride wouldn't let him before, plus, he didn't want to annoy the older man any more than he did already…_Maybe he wouldn't mind me sleeping on the floor near his bed?_

He pondered to himself for a couple of minutes before going back into the guest room and grabbing the sheets and his pillow before making his way back to the master bedroom. Harry opened the door slowly, sneaking over to a bare spot on the hardwood floor near the foot of the bed, placing the items on the floor sleep on. He spared a glance at the top of the bed, freezing as he realized that Snape was awake and openly staring at him.

Harry blushed brightly, utterly embarrassed, "U-Um, I-I'm sorry…I…I just…," he paused, "F-Forget it, I'll go." He stuttered, scrambling to pick up all the blankets.

Snape sat up in his bed, watching as Harry tripped over one of the sheets and fall to the ground, a stream of curses escaping the younger man's lips. He winced slightly, getting out of bed to help the boy up, "Watch your mouth, Potter." He said chuckling. Snape hauled the man to his feet, gripping tighter as the man went to pull away, "What made you come in here, Potter?"

Harry looked away, "I…I just need to sleep on the floor here. I won't bother you, I promise." He murmured.

Snape shook his head, "Don't avoid my question, Potter." He demanded softly, "Now, tell me."

Harry looked away, "I can't sleep. Too many nightmares, so I decided to try and sleep near someone, it usually helps." He admitted sheepishly.

Snape arched an eyebrow, "And you would sleep on a wooden floor with a few sheets?" he asked.

Harry glanced up at him, "I figured that you wouldn't want to be awoken for something as insignificant as that."

Snape sighed and rolled his eyes, "Get into the bed, Potter. It's big enough for the both of us." He bent down, picking up the sheets and throwing them on top of his dresser for him to take care of in the morning.

Snape turned around to find Harry staring at him in shock, "Well? Go on!" He motioned with his hand to the bed.

Harry glanced at the bed cautiously, making his way on top of the mattress and under the sheets, "You better not do anything, you pervert…" He muttered.

Snape shook his head, chuckling softly again while he climbed back into bed. He made himself comfortable on his side of the bed, staring at the brown mop of hair peeking out from under the covers. Snape smiled softly before, closing his eyes and letting sleep overtake him once again.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Snape groaned softly as his alarm started going off, the shrill beeping echoing in the room. He reached over groggily with his hand, reaching around until his hand brushed up against the top of the alarm, effectively turning the accursed contraption off; _I really need to find a good radio station to wake up to in the morning…_

Snape shifted back under the covers, freezing as he felt something tighten around his waist. He glanced down under the covers to find a pair of tanned arms wrapped securely around his lower torso. Snape turned his head, finding Potter pressed firmly against him from behind, and the boy's head snuggled against the back of his neck.

Harry started to stir and Snape instantly feinted sleep, not wanting to embarrass the man when he woke up. He felt the body around him tense instantly as Harry became fully awake.

Harry panicked instantly, brain rushing into overload as he tried to figure out a way out of his current predicament. He looked up to see if the older man was awake, sighing in relief as he was still fast asleep. Harry pulled his arms away from Snape slowly, sighing in relief as he pulled free without a reaction from the man. He scooted across the bed quickly, pulling back the covers and running out of the room and into the master bathroom.

Snape sighed, rolling over and laying in the spot Harry had just vacated, reveling in the heat that still lingered. He listened as he heard the toilet flush and the sink start to run water.

The door opened slowly and Harry walked out, staring at him with wide eyes, "S-Snape. Did I wake you?" he asked sheepishly.

Snape sat up slowly, "No, no. My alarm went off. How did you sleep?" He grinned inwardly.

The effect was instantaneous. Harry's face heated up, looking away instantly. Snape smiled softly, shaking his head, "Never mind then." He threw back the covers, climbing out of bed, "What would you like for breakfast?"

Harry looked up again, "You don't need to cook me anything…" he argued.

Snape shrugged, "Fine then, suit yourself." He opened his dresser drawers, scrounging around for clothes to wear. Snape glanced back to find Harry still standing there, "If you don't mind I would like to get dressed in peace." He deadpanned.

Harry reacted instantly, running out of the room, and closing the door behind him. He walked back into the small kitchenette, looking around for something to do. He noticed a frying pan and spatula already set out on the counter, looking back to the master bedroom he rushed over and opened the refrigerator, pulling out the carton of eggs and set them on the other side of the stove. Harry turned the burner on medium, spraying Pam onto the frying pan.

He was going to cook a great breakfast for the both of them.

Harry cracked an egg, dropping the goop into the middle of the pan. He broke the yolk with his spatula before going over and putting four pieces of toast into the toaster.

Harry worked quickly, wanting to have the food done for when Snape was out of the shower. Ten minutes later he had two egg and cheese sandwiches made and was digging around in the refrigerator for a bottle of orange juice to go with the meal.

Harry had just set everything out on the small table when Snape walked into the room. He stared at the meal, raising his eyebrow in curiosity, "What's all this for?"

Harry grinned sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head, "Nothing, I just felt like making something is all."

Snape snorted. "I can't believe that those godfathers of yours actually taught you something useful."

Harry glared, "Are you going to eat or aren't you?" he hissed.

Snape chuckled softly, sitting down at the table, "Yessir, sorry sir." He joked.

Harry 'hmmphed', sitting down also, only having to get up a few moments later when someone knocked on the front door, "I'll get it." He walked through the living room quickly, opening the door. His eyes widened.

It was the young man from the arts and crafts store. He glared at Harry suspiciously, "Who're you?" he asked.

Harry stuck out his hand, "Harry. Harry Potter."

The man pushed past him, looking around, "Where's Severus?" he asked, his tone icy, "Severus!" he shouted.

Said man appeared from the kitchen, a confused look on his face, "Allen? What are you doing here?"

Allen stalked up to him, glaring ferociously, "What the hell am I doing here?! What the hell is _he_," he pointed at Harry, "doing here?!"

Harry flinched slightly from the animosity Allen was showing.

"Are you sleeping with him?!" Allen accused.

Harry eyes widened and he nearly gagged. Snape looked ready to strangle the man for even suggesting it, "He's my patient, Allen. There is nothing going on between us," he stated coldly.

Allen quieted down instantly, smiling pleasantly, "Oh, alright then." He turned and faced Harry, an evil glint in his eyes, "Sorry, I guess I over-reacted." His eyes didn't look sorry at all. They held a blatant threat. Harry recognized it instantly and glared in return, "It's alright. No harm done." He murmured.

Allen turned to face Severus again, wrapping his arms around his waist, "I just came by to wish you good luck on your meeting today." He stood up on his toes and kissed him briefly on the lips before pulling away. He glanced quickly over to Harry before reaching up and tugging on Severus's hair, pulling him down again for a more passionate and longer kiss.

Harry looked away, a deep rage in his eyes. He understood the man's anger towards him before, but this was pushing it! Harry hadn't even said nor done anything to even hint at liking Snape and yet this man hated and despised him already!

The couple broke apart a few minutes later. Snape wrapping his arms around Allen's petite waist, "Thanks, although you really didn't need to come all the way out here just for this." He murmured.

Allen chuckled and hugged him possessively, glancing once again in Harry's direction, "It's what lovers are for, right?" he asked.

Snape nodded before pulling away, "Are you going to stay for a while?" he asked, tilting his head to the side.

Allen shook his head, "Nah, can't Sevvy. I would like to but unfortunately I have to got visit the parents. They'll be expecting me in another hour or so, so I should be on my way." He kissed Severus on the cheek before walking over to Harry, extending his hand.

Harry shook his hand, Allen squeezing way too hard for comfort, " Well, was nice to meet you, Harry. Maybe we'll see each other around some time?" He squeezed harder.

Harry couldn't hold back a wince, "Yeah, maybe."

Allen let go, Harry flexing his fingers. He grinned at that, "Well, bye Sevvy! I'll call you tonight to see how things go, okay?" He waited for an agreement before leaving the apartment.

Harry glared at the door before returning to the kitchen, his appetite gone. He pitched the sandwich in the trash, going over to the sink to wash the dishes.

Harry heard Snape return into the kitchen. He opted to ignore him and continue cleaning the dishes. Snape, unfortunately, had other ideas, "Harry? Are you alright?" he asked.

Harry 'hmm'ed a response, scrubbing the dish he was cleaning with more force than necessary. He didn't know why he was so mad. Snape wasn't his so he shouldn't have become so worked up over recent events, but he had, and he wanted to strangle Snape for it, even if it wasn't his fault.

A hand reached down, pulling the sponge and plate from his grasp, and effectively moved him out of the way. Snape set the dishes down, turning to face Harry, "Now, tell me what's wrong."

Harry glanced over at him, sighing at the look of pure concern radiating from his eyes, "Nothing's wrong, Snape. Don't worry about it." He mumbled.

Snape's brows furrowed, "Is it what Allen said about us sleeping together?"

Harry looked at him abhorred, "No! Dear gods, no." he answered quickly, internally laughing at how dense the psychiatrist really was. He shook his head, smiling, "He doesn't like me, is all."

Snape tilted his head to the side, a disbelieving look on his face, "Are you sure about that? He seemed to like you a lot."

Harry laughed humorlessly, waving his hand dismissively, "I'm sure, Snape. He nearly broke my fingers because he liked me so much."

Snape frowned but shrugged it off, "Well, I'm going to go finish getting ready so do as you please till your godfathers get here." He left.

Harry watched his retreat calmly, frowning when he felt the urge to draw. He picked up his drawing pad and pens, making his way into the living room and settling himself down in the middle of the couch.

Harry opened the pad, flipping past the picture of Snape to a fresh page. He didn't know what he was going to draw so he just let his hand move lazily across the page, giving his body full control. Harry watched as the outline of a face appeared on the paper. He felt rage surge through his body and started drawing stiffly, all the marks sharp and quick.

Harry groaned when he realized that he was drawing Allen's sneering face when he had looked over at him to "apologize". He wanted to stop. He didn't want to see that face every time he drew, but his body wouldn't let him. It wanted it on paper and no matter how much his mind wanted to stop, his heart always out-powered him.

He finished the lined sketch when Snape returned, turning so that his back hid the picture from view. Harry didn't know why, but he didn't want the older man to see it. Something told him that he shouldn't.

Snape sat in an armchair across from him, crossing his arms in front of his chest, "Have you heard from Remus and the mutt yet?"

Harry didn't even look up from his drawing, "No." His hand moved faster across the paper.

Snape sighed, "I have to leave in a couple minutes if I am to make it to the meeting on time. Can I trust you not to vandalize anything and lock up before you go?" his tone was serious.

Harry looked up over at him, "Yeah, sure. I'm only going to be drawing." He held up the pad to emphasize his point.

Snape nodded, "There is a key under the doormat next door. You can use that to lock up."

Harry frowned, "Why would you put your key under someone else's mat?"

Snape smirked, "It's so that if anyone finds it they won't think that it's mine. How else do you think I can hide a spare key without someone realizing it was mine?" he questioned matter-of-factly. He got up slowly when he got no response, "Well, I have to go. Tell Remus to call me when he gets a chance." He donned a black leather jacket from the coat rack beside the door and exited the apartment.

Harry paused in his drawing and looked around, slightly irked at the eerie silence that seemed to overtake the place as soon as the man left. He shook his head to clear his thoughts and continued with his sketch.

Harry didn't know how much time had past before he heard a resounding knock at the front door, getting up to answer it. Once again, it was someone Harry didn't know, an older man this time. He seemed professional, with a straight black suit and shades on, but also, dangerous at the same time.

The man nodded his head in greeting, "Good morning sir, is Mr. Snape in?"

Harry shook his head, his uneasiness rising, "N-No. He's out at the moment."

The man frowned at this, "Out? Do you know where to perhaps?"

Harry paused a second before shaking his head. He didn't trust this man with that kind of information, "No, he said that he had some running to do. He wasn't specific." Harry murmured.

The man stepped forward, "Well, I'll wait for him here then." Harry blocked his way,

"Sorry, he said no guests, plus I'm just about to leave so I wouldn't feel right leaving you here alone." Harry protested.

The man was quiet for a moment before speaking again, "Fine, then. Tell him I'll be back tomorrow so we can talk. Oh, and tell him that I'll keep coming back until we do."

Harry glared, "Was that a threat?" he hissed.

The man grinned, "No. It's a promise."

SHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Harry was quiet in the backseat of his godfather's car. He was thinking about what that man had said before about talking with the older man. Harry was worried that he would try and do something to the dark-haired psychiatrist. Snape was a twig compared to that guy! He frowned, what was Snape doing with people like that anyways?

Remus jarred him from his thoughts, "Are you alright, Harry? You're too quiet." He spared a glance at the young man through his rear-view mirror, "Did something happen while you were at Severus's place?" he inquired.

Harry looked up, smiling reassuringly, "No,nothing happened Remus. Don't worry."

Sirius turned around in his seat, "Yeah, if he did do something he knows I would kick his ass." Sirius said triumphantly.

Harry frowned, "I'm just worried for him, that's all."

Remus and Sirius both smiled at him and laughed, "Don't worry, Harry. Severus can take care of himself." Remus reassured.

Sirius agreed, albeit very quietly and with less enthusiasm, "Yeah, that git can take care of himself. Don't worry about a guy like him."

Harry nodded, not reassured in the least, "I hope your right."

_I really, truly, do._

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Snape tensed instantly when he re-entered his apartment, sensing that something wasn't right. He set the bags of groceries he was carrying down quietly next to the doorway, pulling out a small pocket knife from inside his pocket. Snape drew the blade, walking stealthily around his living room and into the kitchen, looking around for anything out of place. He tensed when he felt a blade press against the sensitive skin of his neck,

"Welcome back, Severus." A voice hissed in his ear.

All Snape could remember after that was a bone shattering pain in the back of his head.

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

TBC

Author's Note:

Oooh!! What's going to happen to poor Sev now?

Also, we finally meet Severus's boyfriend and he's a complete ass! I don't even like him and I created him! Sheesh...Well, I was going to have Draco be the boyfriend but I decided against it since there is another important role he can play in my story. Heh. I hope that everything flowed correctly... Review please! I really love reviews! I'm addicted I tell you.Don't you want to make me happy? Lol.

The review addicted author,

Momo


	6. Log 6

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, only my little plot.

Enjoy!!

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Chapter 6

Three months. That man had been missing for three whole _fucking_ months.

Harry slammed the phone back down onto the receiver, storming his way into the living room. He would call three times every single day, hoping beyond hope that Snape would answer. The brunette ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head when both Sirius and Remus looked over at him expectantly.

"He'll show up soon Harry. Trust me." Sirius stated hopefully. Remus nodded in agreement, moving over so that Harry could plop down beside him,

"It's all my fault. I should have reported that man when he threatened Snape. I should have done something!" Harry shouted. He leaned forward holding his head in his hands. He was tired, both physically and mentally. His body was only acting with the bare minimum of effort.

Harry didn't know when he had come to care so much about the dark-haired psychiatrist. All he knew was that the older man had now become the center of his life at the moment, always on his mind, always weighing on his heart, "What if he's dead like the rest of them? What if…what if Tom has him, and...and he's being tortured because of me?" Harry felt Remus stiffen beside him before two pairs of arms encircled him, whispering comforting thoughts into his ears,

"He's alive, Harry."

"I know that skinny-ass bastard well. Nothing'll wear that man down. He can't die without trying to take me with him." That got Sirius a smack on the back of the head from Remus.

Harry laughed humorlessly, "I guess so."

They all jumped when the cordless started ringing in the other room. Harry scrambled out of their hold and picked up the phone before the second ring, "H-Hello?"

"Hello. This is Deputy-in-Chief Shacklebolt. I would just like to inform you that there has been an update on the investigation involving the disappearance of Severus Snape. If you wouldn't mind-"

Harry cut him off, "Did you find him? Is he alive?"

The voice softened, "I think it would be better if we talked down at the precinct. Can you come down in an hour or so? My boss would like to speak to you personally."

Harry's eyes watered slightly before he brushed the moisture away, already expecting the worst, "A-Alright, we'll be there." He set the phone gently onto the receiver and made his way back into the living room, receding into an impenetrable shell that he had perfected over the last month or so.

Remus and Sirius glanced at each other before prodding him for answers, "…Harry?" they whispered.

Harry sat down onto the couch staring at his hands, "Police station called, wants us to come down. There's been an update." His eyes misted over and he didn't bother to stop them as tears flowed down his cheeks, "He didn't answer me when I asked him if he was alive…"

Remus stood up, walking over to the front door and donning his jacket, "C'mon Harry. We've gotten this far. We can't give up hope now." He tossed Sirius his jacket before putting on his shoes.

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Harry stood in front of the Police Station, fretting over whether or not to stay and find out what happened and how he died, or run away, and cling to that self-satisfaction that he wasn't the one who had to id. the body. He was seriously considering the latter of the two.

Sirius noticed and grabbed my elbow, "C'mon." He dragged Harry inside; reminding him of the first time they visited the psychiatric firm. This caused a string of pain to lance through his heart.

The trio walked through the lobby to the reception counter, a fat, balding, cop acknowledging them, "May I help you guys?"

"We got a call from a guy named Shacklebolt? He said to come down for a meeting with the chief." Sirius smiled slightly.

The fat man regarded him closely, "He did, eh? Well, we'll have to see about that. I'll be right back." The man rose out of his chair, the chair creaking its relief, before walking into a back room.

Sirius leaned against the counter, looking over to find a fresh pack of Dunkin' Donuts sitting on the fat officer's desk. He reached down plucking three from the box and handing one to each of his companions, replying to Remus's critical glare, "He doesn't need anymore, trust me. We're adding at least two years onto his life, minimum." He grinned when Remus started eating his doughnut, eating his quickly before the officer decided to come back.

An officer approached them from behind, "Still up to your thieving ways, eh Sirius?"

Sirius and Remus whirled around, "Tonks?"

The pink-haired officer smiled brightly, laughing when Sirius embraced her happily, stating, "Nice to see you again too Sirius!" She looked over at Remus and Harry noticed for a split second that her smiled faltered before returning to full force, "Nice to see you again too, Remy." Remus merely smiled and nodded his agreement.

Tonks pulled away from Sirius, positioning herself in front of Harry and extending her hand, "Nymphadora Tonks at your service, but please, call me Tonks."

Harry smiled shyly and shook her hand quickly before pulling away, "Harry Potter." Tonks' eyes widened in recognition,

"Y-You're the one that…oh, I'm so sorry." She hugged him tightly across the shoulders, before pulling away, placing her hands on his shoulders, "I promise you, Harry. No matter what, I'm gonna catch that bastard, I promise." She smiled before straightening up and looking over her shoulders at the godfathers, motioning with her left hand to follow her, "I'll take you to the chief now. That other guy has been waiting for a while."

She lead them into a white hallway, motioning at each of the doors, "That is the lounge, that one there is the ladies' bathroom, that's the men's, and this one leads to the jail cells. Avoid going in there at all costs, there's some _bad _people in there that you don't want to be seen affiliated with, and, ah, here we are this is the door to the Chief's office." She knocked on the door, shouting, "Boss, I've brought the kid and his guardians!"

Harry heard a muffled voice before Tonks opened the door and ushered them into the spacious office. His eyes fell on the man sitting in the chair opposite the chief, hatred filling his eyes, "Allen…"

The other male turned his head sharply, surprise, anger, and confusion expressed in his eyes, "Huh…?" He shot up out of his chair, pointing an enraged finger at the brunette while yelling at the chief, "What the hell is he doing here?! I didn't invite him!"

Harry smirked sardonically, "Nice to see you too, asshole." He made his way over to the chair next to Allen and sat down angering the dirty blonde even more. Grey eyes flashed with rage, only taking a step before Tonks intervened, forcing him back into his chair,

"Harry has every right to be here. Unlike you, he's done everything in his power to help this investigation move forward. You showed no interest in whether or not Snape returned to you alive or dead. You should consider yourself grateful that we even called you to begin-" The chief raised his hand, Tonks stopping immediately.

"Thank you, Tonks. Now if you may leave so that we can continue?" His voice remained calm even though Harry detected an underlying hint of annoyance at her little outburst. Harry smiled up at her as she left, silently thanking her for what she said. She gave him a thumbs-up before exiting the office.

The Chief sighed and ran his fingers through his graying hair, "Now as you all know I am Chief Harrison head officer of this precinct-"

Harry interceded, "Is Snape alive? Did you find him?" He stood up, placing his hands on the Chief's desk and staring him straight in the eyes, "I don't need the pleasantries, just tell me what you know. Is. Snape. Alive."

Chief Harrison, waved him back dismissively, "I'm sorry, now please sit back down in your chair, Harry." He waited until Harry complied, "I have some good news and I got some bad news along with it. First off, we have found Severus Snape. He is currently in St. Mungo's Hospital receiving treatment-"

Harry spared a glance in Allen's direction, surprised to see no emotion at all in the man's face. His brows furrowed, _Why isn't he happy that Snape's alright?_ He returned his attention to the Chief,

"-The bad news is that when we found him in the alleyway his body was nearly unrecognizable from all the damage that had been done so you see, he's…uh, well, he's in a coma."

Harry's blood ran cold, _A…A coma…? Snape's in a coma?_ He had to ask, "Do…do you think he'll come out of it?"

The Chief regarded him gravely, "I'm sorry to say but from what the doctors are telling me there's little to no chance that he'll come back. The damage that had been done was numerous and fatal. The doctors are even surprised that he's lived this long already."

Allen finally spoke and what he said made Harry see red, "If there's a great possibility he won't wake up then why don't they just pull the plug?"

The man didn't even have time to react before a fist collided heavily with his face, knocking him out of his chair and onto the floor. Harry pinned him down, green eyes sparkling with rage, "_How fucking __**dare**__ you…! How dare you say that! He's your goddamn lover and that's all you can say?! You don't love him! You don't love him at all! …People like you make me sick…!!" _He got back up and backed away quickly; clenching his teeth tightly to keep from doing anything rash, "Stay away from him for now on, Allen. He doesn't need someone like you."

Allen climbed up off the floor, holding his broken and bloody nose in his hands. The look in Allen's eyes made Harry freeze instantly. They were the same, the same as Tom's when he killed Harry's parents, the same iciness that kept Harry up at night, tossing and turning in his bed from fear of the past.

His voice jolted him out of his thoughts, "You love him…You're in love with Severus!" Allen grinned wickedly, blood trailing down his face, "This is just fucking hilarious! A mentally unstable person falling in love with an idiot!" He laughed loudly, a crazed insane kind of laugh, "Well you can have him. I don't know what I was thinking, entertaining a fool like that." He shook his head before looking over at the police chief, "You'll be hearing from my father soon, _sir_, since I'll be filing charges against you. Good riddance…" He stalked out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

Sirius and Remus grabbed Harry, preventing him from pursuing Allen. Tonks rushed into the room a couple minutes later, followed closely by another officer, "What happened to that kid? He's dripped blood all over the place!"

The chief shook his head, ignoring Tonk's question while running his fingers roughly through his hair, "Shacklebolt, call the hospital and spread the word that Allen Dunkirk is to go nowhere near Severus Snape's room until further notice."

The senior officer glanced over at Harry before nodding curtly and leaving the room.

Tonks headed over to Harry immediately, looking him over for any signs of injuries, "Did he hurt you?"

Harry moved away, "I'm fine. Don't worry about it." He looked over at his godparents who were eying him questioningly, "Can we go to the hospital? I want to see him."

They glanced at each other before looking at Chief Harrison, "_Can_ Harry visit him even if he's in a coma?"

The Chief shrugged, "You'll have to take that up with the doctor's there. I have no authority over that."

Harry moved to the door instantly, "Let's go then, before visiting hours end." He walked out.. Remus and Sirius followed suit.

Remus rubbed the bridge of his nose, glancing up at Harry's back as he walked a couple feet ahead of him. He whispered to Sirius, "Do you think Allen is right about Harry loving Severus? It would make sense, with the way he's been acting for the past month."

Sirius looked over at Harry as well, "I can actually sorta believe it. I mean, did you see how he reacted to that prick when he said it? He _froze_. Everything stopped in his mind right then. I'm guessing that Harry just realized it himself." He whispered softly.

They reached the car and Sirius laughed to see Harry tapping his foot impatiently for them to hurry up, "Alright, alright, we're coming! Don't get your panties in a bunch!"

Harry blushed instantly, punching him on the shoulder when he got close enough, "I'm not!"

Remus smiled, happy that Harry was taking the news well. He got in and started the car, waiting for the other two to get into the car with him.

When the two men finally found enough time during their argument session to get in the car, Remus started it up and pulled out of the parking lot and onto the main road.

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The drive to the hospital was a silent one, everyone deep in thought the whole way.

When they arrived in the Hospital parking lot Harry couldn't stop a shiver of fear from traveling up his spine. What if Snape hated him when he woke up? What if…what if he never woke up again? He shook his head. He couldn't think like that, he needed to be strong.

Harry stepped out of the car, staring at the huge red-lit cross above the sliding glass doors, _Please…whoever is watching over his soul right now, please, I beg to you with all my heart, bring him back, bring him back to me..._

He walked through the sliding glass doors and into the unknown.

TBC

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Author's Note: Well, I finally had enough time to update this story and I am sorry for the long wait. I really feel bad for taking so long, but it being so close to the end of school I just couldn't find time to write anymore. I hope this lives up to your expectations. Review please!

Momo


	7. Log 7

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, only this little plot and my plot monster...

Well, Enjoy!

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Chapter 7

Harry walked up to the service desk, staring forlornly at perfect white walls as he passed. The smell of bleach and death hung over him like an omen. He cleared his throat quickly, catching the attention of the young nurse at the desk.

She looked up at him expectantly, "Name?"

"Harry Potter. I'm here to visit Severus Snape." He pulled out proper identification and showed it to her before placing it back into his wallet.

She pulled out and flipped through a stack of papers clipped to a clipboard, "Hmm, Snape you say? Well, his name is listed here but there's no room number…Hold on a moment." The young woman rose from her chair, leaning over the desk, looking around for something or someone in particular, "…Oh! Dr. Pomfrey! Dr. Pomfrey, over here! Can you come here for a second?" she shouted down the hall, waving.

Harry watched as a stern-looking woman made her way to the desk, "Yes, Maria?" She noticed Harry standing there and smiled politely, "Oh, good evening." Dr. Pomfrey returned her attention to the desk nurse, "Well? I have patients to check on."

Maria showed the doctor her clipboard, pointing at a place on the paper, "Do you know what room this man is in?"

Dr. Pomfrey frowned, looking over to Harry, "I'm sorry; he's not allowed any visitors at the moment. With the circumstances dealing with his disappearance there would pose too much of a risk-"

Harry rushed forward gripping the cuffs of her lab coat, "Please, please let me see him. I-I can't stand waiting any longer…_please._" His eyes glittered with unshed tears, "_Please, Dr. Pomfrey…"_

Pomfrey sighed, eyes laden with guilt, "What's your name young man?"

Harry wiped his eyes swiftly, sniffing, "Harry… Harry Potter." He glanced over at his godfathers who were watching the exchange silently from two chairs in the waiting room. Remus smiled while Sirius gave him quick thumbs up. He chuckled softly at the sight.

Pomfrey followed his gaze and smiled thinly, "It seems you have people rooting for your success." She paused, "Very well then, you may see him, but I will have to have you sign a contract of secrecy and have your session monitored by one of my staff members. Is that fair?"

Harry's eyes lit up in ecstasy and in a burst of happiness hugged her tightly, crying happily into her lab coat, "Thank you…Thank you so much!"

Pomfrey's cheeks reddened slightly as she pat his back awkwardly, "Yes, well. The faster we get the contract signed the faster you get to see him." She detached herself from his grip and motioned for Maria to get the necessary paperwork, "So, Harry Potter you say? That name sounds familiar. Were you on a TV. show or something?"

Harry chuckled softly, "Have you heard of the Riddle-Potter murder case in 2004?"

The doctor thought for a moment, "Yes, I believe so. Wasn't that when that one guy, um…Tom, was it, murdered his boyfriend's parents in order to get back at him for some sort of betrayal?"

Harry nodded and muttered, "I was that boyfriend."

Doctor Pomfrey's eyes went wide as a hand covered a gasp, "Y-You? You were that young man?" She shook her head, frowning, "That was a horrible year. I remember it now. People were coming in by the bucket loads, claiming to be assaulted by this vigilante group known as the "Death Eaters". No charges were ever made against the assailants…but the damage done was extensive" The woman sighed, shaking her head.

Maria returned with the contract, smiling apologetically towards Harry, "Sorry for the wait, I tried to hurry as fast I could." She reached over the help desk and grabbed a spare clipboard, clipping the contract to the board. She pointed to the bottom of several pages and described each of which he was signing and what they entailed, "Got it?" She handed him a pen.

Harry signed all the papers and handed them to Maria, "I'll make sure that I remember all that." He looked over at his godfathers, who had gotten up and were making their way over to him, "Are my godfather's allowed to come in with me?"

Dr. Pomfrey stared at them, "No. I'm already risking a patient's safety by letting you visit. I will not allow anyone else. They are, however, allowed to wait outside in the hall. That would be doable." She turned away, walking down the hall, "Follow me, please."

Remus, Sirius, and Harry followed the brown-haired woman to the elevator and boarded quickly, observing quietly as she pulled out a silver key and lifted a plastic lid turning the key inside the lock and pressing in a security code soon afterwards, "We've tightened security since his arrival," she replied to his unasked question. She pressed the button labeled 14 before stepping away, "Now, for the rules. There is to be only one visitor in the room at a time. No food or beverages are allowed in the room due to the machinery. You will be monitored at all times. And finally, only 1 hour visits per day." She raised her hand when Harry moved to interrupt. "It may be changed if needed, but since we are only starting out I would like to start out in small doses, even if he is in a coma."

The steel doors opened wide, Dr. Pomfrey exiting before Harry had a chance to argue. She walked briskly down the hall and to the last door on the hall, and, pulling out another set of keys and unlocking the door, disappeared inside.

Harry faltered at the doorway, staring at the darkened room ahead of him and the hazy outline of a bed pressed against the far wall and in the middle of the room. How much had changed in three months? Would he even recognize him anymore? The uncertainty plagued him and he wasn't sure anymore that he wanted to see Severus. _Snape_, his thoughts reminded him, _He's Snape to you, nothing else._

A hand was placed gently on his shoulder and he realized with shock that he had started crying. He wiped his cheeks with the top of his sleeve, looking over at Sirius who was staring down at him concerned, "It's alright, take your time." Harry bit his bottom lip, looking away. He stepped forward and entered the dark room.

Harry saw the neon glow on the machines and the whirring that seemed to echo throughout the room. His footsteps resounded across the tile as he made his way over to Dr. Pomfrey, who was holding the curtain surrounding the bed.

It felt as if time had stopped when he entered the room, as if all his problems dissipated at that moment and had lost all of its significance. Nothing mattered anymore except for the man who was now laying in the bed across from him, deep in a coma.

Harry reached the side of the bed and waited silently as Dr. Pomfrey started pulling the curtains back. She paused right before revealing his face, "I must warn you, he was wounded pretty severely during his absence. It still amazes me that he's even survived for this long. So, even knowing this, you still want to see him, don't you?" Silence answered her question, "Alright, here we go." She pulled the curtain all the way back.

Harry gasped and felt his world spin. He covered his mouth with his hands as tears streamed freely down his face again. It felt as if all the air had been sucked out of the room and he struggled for breath, "Oh…oh my god…" His knees gave out as he tried to move and he collapsed onto the floor, trying to regain any semblance of his sanity that he thought he could keep and control.

Dr. Pomfrey kneeled down, rubbing his back slowly, "Calm down, Harry. Do you want to leave?" she murmured.

Harry shook his head quickly, "N-No. I will not back down." It took him a while but he got up again, wavering slightly from the nausea that flooded his stomach, and gripped the baseboard along the edge of the bed. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, trying to calm his face and heart.

Dr. Pomfrey closed the curtain. She moved and placed a hand gently on Harry's shoulder, "Please dear, come back tomorrow. He won't go anywhere, I promise."

Harry shook his head and shoved past her, gripping the white curtain in shaking hands, "I…I can't! I can't leave him alone again! It was all my fault…," He gripped the curtain tighter, eyes glaring into the cloth, "If I had done something! If I had cared enough. If I had noticed enough. If I…If I had loved enough!" His voice was a mere whisper at this point.

Dr. Pomfrey watched in silence, letting him continue.

"What if he had died? What if he doesn't wake up?" Harry asked, looking over at her with blatant fear in his eyes.

Dr. Pomfrey shook her head, giving him a soothing smile, "There is still a chance that he will wake up. It is your job, now, to not lose hope. To give it all you have to help him along." She waved in Snape's general direction, "There is a chance that he can hear you, even in his comatose state. Talk to him; give him a path to walk on to bring him back to this world. Show him the way, because he's lost right now, swimming in an in-between place that he can't escape from. At least, that is what I believe."

Harry stared silently at the white curtain as he took in what she had just told him, "I…I don't think that I will be much help…"

Her voice was firm, "You _can _help him. Anyone who cares as much as you obviously do can accomplish anything if they try. Now, I have patients to tend to so I'll check in on you later." She paused at the door, "Oh, and if you need anything, my full name is Doctor Poppy Pomfrey, goodnight." She left.

Harry stared solemnly at the empty doorway before turning around and pulling away the white curtain again; having to, once again, hold back the tears that threatened to spill.

The man before him wasn't what he remembered him to be. His hair was completely shaven off. Bruises and cuts littered his entire face and body. Hues of purples, browns, and yellows colored his usually pale skin. Harry pulled back the blanket, fully revealing his body, clad in only boxers, to his shocked eyes. Not a spot on his body was spared from the torture he obviously endured. Deep, long lacerations ran down his chest and Harry ran the tips of fingers across every single one of them, imprinting them to memory.

Harry heard shouting down the hall and footsteps but paid no mind, focusing only on the man in front of him. He moved to turn Snape onto his side.

"Hey! What are you doing?!" A voice shouted from across the room.

Harry jumped back immediately, eyes looking like a deer caught in the headlights, "I-I was only…"

The man rushed over and shoved him out of the way, glaring at him heatedly, "I told you that he was mine! MINE!" He shoved Harry again, "You're not worthy of touching him!"

Harry stared at the other man confused, feeling as if he should recognize the person in front of him, "Do…Do I know you?"

The man snarled, "You stole him from me… He wouldn't see me again after you showed up…You ruined everything for me!"

Harry backed away instantly, remembering a similar conversation long ago, "N-Neil?"

Neil smirked, "So you still remember me, eh? Heh. Amazing." He turned and faced Severus's, _Snape_'s Harry thought firmly, bed.

The scraggly man touched a bruised cheek, "He's so ugly now, if only you hadn't shown up and ruined everything, none of this would have happened."

Harry frowned, stepping forward and shoving Neil away, "Shut up! You don't know anything about this!" Anger swelled in his chest at his indifference.

Neil smirked triumphantly, "I know more about this than even you know." He turned sharply when he heard voices shouting and getting closer, "Well, it's time for me to go. See you later, and," He gripped Harry shirt, pulling him so close that their noses brushed, "Stay away from Severus or you will pay, dearly." He hissed before throwing him back and making a mad dash out of the room.

Doctors and nurses alike swarmed the room a few minutes later. Doctor Pomfrey among them. She made her way over to him, concern evident on her face, "What happened? Where is the intruder?" she asked when she was close enough.

Harry shook his head, "He's not here. He left right before you got here."

Dr. Pomfrey frowned and shouted some orders over her shoulder to her subordinates and they quickly exited the room. She returned her attention to Harry, "What happened to the nurse I placed here after I left?"

Harry frowned, scratching the back of his head, "Nurse? There was no nurse. Nobody showed up after you left. Was someone supposed to?"

Dr. Pomfrey sighed and shook her head disapprovingly, "That Mundungus I swear, ask him to do something so simple and he still can't do it right." Something beeped in her coat pocket and she pulled out a black pager, "Well, I have to leave you again. A patient has gone into seizures and I need to overlook the treatment. Goodnight." The woman ran out of the room, a few moments later reappearing in the doorway, "Oh, and Harry dear, please, I know that you are trustworthy but I need you to leave in an hour. Visiting hours ended half an hour ago but I'll give you another hour due to this mess. Thank you." She disappeared down the hall once again.

Harry sighed and grabbed a chair from against a wall and set it next to the bed, collapsing into it and letting his head fall into his hands. Silence settled over the room and Harry sighed, "Um…so uh, how are you doing Snape?" He paused for a couple of minutes before laughing humorlessly, "Damn, I'm not good at this…" He sat up, grabbing a bruised hand out of impulse and running his thumb over the veins, "How could anyone do this to another person?" He whispered quietly. A picture of Tom flittered through his mind and he gripped the hand tighter, "I'll protect you from now on alright? So you don't have to worry about anything ever again." He kissed the exposed palm before resting his head against the hand and closed his eyes, whispering, "I don't want to live another day without being able to see you, without being able to talk to you…" He choked, "Please, don't make me wait any longer…come back to me." Harry felt a little better and remained silent after that. His eyes closed as his breathing evened out and he fell asleep.

Harry groaned and shifted as his shoulder was shaken roughly, "Harry…Harry dear, wake up. It's two in the morning." His head was prodded next,

"C'mon Harry, wake up you dolt."

Harry opened his groggy eyes and stared at the swollen, passive face of his psychiatrist, confusion evident on his face, "Wha-…?" He sat up quickly, looking around hurriedly, "What did I do? Did something happen?!"

The hazy blobs around him laughed happily as he scrambled to put on his glasses, "Remus, Sirius? Dr. Pomfrey? What's wrong?"

Remus smiled happily, "You fell asleep Harry. Of course, we did too, but yeah. It's time for us to go. I think we've over stayed our welcome."

Dr. Pomfrey smiled and went to the other side of the bed, checking on Snape and covering his body again with the sheets, "It's perfectly alright, nothing serious happened while he was asleep." She pressed some buttons on the heart monitor and handed Harry a laminated card, "This is a card that will give you access to Severus's room during service hours without having to find me every single time. I hope you don't take this the wrong way but I think that you are the only one that can help Severus come out of his coma" She nodded assuredly.

Harry took the card from her grasp and stared at it in joy, "Th-Thanks!" He tucked the card in his pocket, got up out of the chair, and stretched lazily, "Well…I guess we should go now…" He moved to take the chair away but stopped and stared at Snape's face, a frown marring his features. What would happen if he left him now? What if Snape disappeared again while he was away? _No, I won't let that happen again!_ His body froze as panic set in. "I…I can't leave him." He looked over at Dr. Pomfrey pleadingly, "You said that I was the only one that can help him but how can I do that if I leave?!"

Dr. Pomfrey frowned and shook her head, "I didn't mean it like that. You can still leave and come back…"

Harry sat back down in his chair and gripped Snape's motionless hand, "I'm not leaving him again! I promised to protect him at all times!" His eyes held a fierce determination. A determination that reverberated in Dr. Pomfrey's heart.

She sighed, staring down at their conjoined hands, "Mr. Potter, please. You cannot stay here. Where would you sleep? We already have a full house as is. And we are not a hotel."

"I just need a bed! I can order food and pick it up at the front door and I'll just shower in the bathroom over there." He pointed across the room, "It'll be like I'm not even here!" He looked over at Remus and Sirius, begging with his eyes for their support.

Remus glanced at Sirius and cleared his throat, "I…I uh, agree with the idea…" He muttered unenthusiastically. He stepped on Sirius's foot.

"Oww, oh! Um, I think that it's a good idea." He glared at Remus accusingly.

Dr. Pomfrey stared at them skeptically, "Mhmm. Right." She sighed, tapping the metal side bar with her forefinger, "If, and I say if, I let you stay here, you are going to have to be confined to this room and you won't be allowed to leave unless to go get food, as you say, from the lobby with nurse escort. There will be no visitors, no phone calls through this room. Cells are permitted but only for emergencies. Is that acceptable?"

Harry nodded solemnly, "I agree to the terms."

Dr. Pomfrey sighed, "Then I suppose that you can stay for at least a couple of days to test it out."

Harry smiled brightly, "Thank you Dr. Pomfrey! I promise not to get in your way!" He looked over at Remus and Sirius, "Can you bring me some clothes and bathroom stuff tomorrow?"

Remus nodded and patted his shoulder, "Yeah, don't worry about that. Make sure that you do all you can for Snape, alright? I don't like having you away from home for too long." He smiled.

Sirius agreed, "Pomfrey, take care of Harry, yeah? He does have a tendency to get into trouble." He groaned as an elbow connected with his ribs, "Oww-ah! Hehehe. Heartburn, sorry." He rubbed his chest convincingly while glaring down at an innocent-looking Harry.

Dr. Pomfrey smiled thinly, moving to say something when her pocket beeped, "Oh, I have a new patient to check up on. Well, Mr. Black, Mr. Lupin. I'm sorry but you two are going to have to leave with me." She moved to the doorway, "Say your goodbyes and let's go."

Remus and Sirius hugged Harry tightly, "Take care, we'll see you tomorrow."

Sirius grinned, "And don't molest Snape now while we're away." Harry blushed brightly and shoved Sirius off him, sputtering obscenities.

The two men laughed heartily and exited the room, leaving behind a beet-red Harry.

Harry shook his head, "What idiots…" He smiled happily at Snape, "Well, I guess I'm here to stay, huh?" He ran a hand through his hair, "Don't worry about what Siri said, I would never do that to you." He leaned back in the chair, sighing, "I wonder what it's like, being in a coma. Is it painful? Do you even _realize _you're in a coma?" Harry closed his eyes, picturing himself in a coma. _Would Snape have stayed with me if he had been in my position?_

Harry jumped up when a knock resounded on the open door. A scraggly male nurse smiled creepily as he pulled in a worn-looking cot, "Hey there. You the one who needs the cot? Heh. Name's Mundungus, Fletcher Mundungus." He tugged the cot over next to Snape's medical bed and set it up, "Well, here ya go." He dusted off his hands as if he had been doing a dirty job and his hands needed dusting off.

Harry smiled his appreciation, "Thanks, I appreciate it."

Mundungus glanced at Snape, "How's he doin'?"

"Normal I guess, I mean, I haven't been here long." Harry admitted. Mundungus nodded.

A voice crackled into the room, "Mundungus, Mundungus! I need you in room 216 A.S.A.P! Bring a mop and bucket. Don't take your time with this!" Dr. Pomfrey's voice fizzed out.

Mundungus pulled out a walkie-talkie from his back pocket, "A'ight, A'ight. I'll be there soon. Don' worry about it." He gave Harry a quick smile, "See ya, man." He hustled out of the room.

Harry stared at the naked bed and sighed. He looked through the small closet near the bed, pulled out two spare sheets, and made his bed. He couldn't find any extra pillows so he stuck his head out of the room, looking around for a familiar face. When he found no one he gave up and went back to his bed, scooting it firmly against Snape's bed.

Harry went back around and sat down in the wooden chair, putting his chin in his hand, "Well, what to talk about?" He looked around the room for inspiration, when finding none, he returned his attention to the psychiatrist, "Well, I've been drawing a lot since you left. Mostly of you and that man I saw. You know, the one looking for you after you left for that meeting?" He frowned, "I think he was involved in your kidnapping, or more appropriately, man-napping," Harry laughed weakly at his joke, "Um, yeah, anyways, I've missed you, Snape, and I need you to come back to me, alright?" He choked slightly, "Damn. How is it that every time I think of you or talk about you I have to get all damn emotional and cry?" He shook his head, wiping his cheeks of moisture yet again.

Harry sat there for who knows how long, telling Snape everything that had happened in the last three months.

A yawn escapes Harry's lips and he rubs his eyes, "Well…I guess I better get _some_ sleep…" He got up tiredly and made his way over to his bed, realizing how tired he actually was as he collapsed on top of it barely having the energy to pull the cover over himself before succumbing to sleep.

Dr. Pomfrey yawned tiredly, checking her watch, "Six a.m. Lord, another all-nighter." She stepped into room 1409 and stopped, a bright smile spread across her face, "Well, well, this was sure unexpected."

Harry was laying right at the edge of the cot on his side. He was as close as humanly possible to Severus without fazing through the metal bars on either side of his bed. Harry's left hand had shoved its way through the gaps and had intertwined itself with Snape's.

Pomfrey sighed. She did not know what made her so lenient towards the young man today. Maybe it was his haunted green eyes, or what he had to go through when he was younger. All in all, he was practically here to stay. She knew after this that either Harry would never leave until Severus came out of his coma or he was dead.

A soft knock echoed off the wooden door, "Is this the young man?"

Pomfrey whirled around, "Oh! Albus! Yes, yes. His name is Harry."

Albus nodded and walked over staring down at Harry calculatingly, "What was his relationship to Severus beforehand?"

Pomfrey consulted her notes, "According to Mr. Black he was a patient of Severus's." She looked up at Albus, "Is that something important?"

The old man stroked his beard, "Yes, actually. I didn't expect to see him so soon." He smiled solemnly, "He was born in this hospital, did you know that?" He shook his head at the memories, "I met Lily when she interned here for a couple of months. A wonderful woman, very gifted in the field of medicine. I met James through her. I remember him to be a strong-willed man, and loyal to no end. They were a wonderful couple. Perfect for each other." Albus smiled at the memories, "I was even invited to the wedding. Oh, such a beautiful wedding. Ah, here I am rambling again! Anyways, treat him well for me." He walked past her, whistling a merry tune.

Dr. Pomfrey stared after him, "U-Uh, yes sir! Right away boss!"

Albus laughed, "And tell Harry later to visit me in my office for a chat, thank you!" He went through the doorway and disappeared into the hall.

Harry shifted and pulled Severus's arm closer, smiling contently. Dr. Pomfrey watched and wondered solemnly, _What does the future hold for them?_

SHshSHshSHshSHshSH

TBC

Author's Note:

Whoo! They finally found Snape! I actually had it before where Harry would take matters into his own hands and go out and look for him but I like this idea better! And so the plot thickens! What _will_ happen to Harry and Snape later on? Well, you'll have to wait and find out!

As always, REVIEW! It make me happy and it keeps the plot monster at bay!

Momo


	8. Log 8

Dislcaimer: I own nothing except the rambling in my head...

_Review Replies:_

Well, I realized something while writing my story. I never took the time out of my life to actually thank and reply to all the wonderful reviewers out there that took the time to read over and review my story! I'm deeply sorry for not acknowledging you guys sooner! I would reply to them all but since there are so many...I'll just start off with the people who commented the last chapter...thanks to everyone else though...

_Gothic Tigress: _Ah, but this is the evil kind of plot monster that only eats plots...I don't want it to take away my ideas...Anyways, thank you so much! I'm glad that you enjoy my writing so much!

_minorly-crazy: _Yes, yes Snape will be fine...in due time...ahem ANYWAYS! Thanks for the review!

_Serpent91: _Thank you for the compliment! I love it when people enjoy my writing!

_Kate Andromeda: _Well, hopefully the fates won't decide to be cruel to them. I'm sorry it took so long to update! I had major writer's block, I mean _crazy_ stuff. My writing went down the toilet to China during that time...most of the stuff I wrote didn't flow or make sense to the story at all!

Well, To Everyone Else, Enjoy!

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Chapter 8

There was no way that Harry would leave Severus's side for anything. So, when Dr. Pomfrey came in the next day, telling him that he had to go see her boss, he just gave her this 'I'm-not-going-anywhere-so-you-can-just-forget-it-now' stare. Dr. Pomfrey sighed,

"Please Harry. He is very anxious to talk to you. I believe it has something to do with your parents." Poppy insisted. Shock and confusion registered across Harry's face,

"My…my parents? He knew them?" Harry asked, curious to know who this character was. Dr. Pomfrey just smiled,

"You'll just have to go see for yourself, now won't you?" She teased, smiling even brighter as Harry stood up and walked swiftly over to the door. He glared at her for using her intriguing doctor skills on him before rushing out the door and down the hall. He asked the receptionist on that floor for directions and took off once more.

Harry cringed when he realized that he would have to take the elevator to reach the old man's office and pushed the clear button. He watched the light flashing across the top of the metal doors, waiting for it to land on his floor. Soon enough the doors parted and Harry entered, pressing the button the receptionist said whilst huddling in the corner instantly as to protect himself and keep himself from hyperventilating.

The ride took a lot longer than Harry wanted, what with people getting on and off on all these different floors he truly wished the man could have made his office on the bottom floors, or at least on the less crowded ones, if that was even possible with how busy the complex was.

When it was finally his floor he rushed out, clutching his hand to his chest tightly as he worked to steady his erratic breathing. Quite a few people and nurses asked him if he was alright as they passed by but Harry just smiled and reassured them that he was fine and not going to drop dead of a heart-attack as someone so kindly put it.

The brunette read the signs as he went along, following the route to his final destination, a clear white door which read 'Dr. Dumbledore' in large black letters and his degrees and expertise written below it.

Harry tried to see if the name sounded familiar at all but couldn't so he knocked hesitantly on the door. There was a cheery 'come in' and Harry turned the handle, secretly wondering what kind of man he was going to have to deal with in the next five seconds.

His eyes widened and he looked around the oval office. Taking in all the different pictures of previous administrators who resided there previously, he brought his eyes to the old man sitting behind a grand oak desk. The man looked familiar somehow, but where? Harry couldn't remember…

"Ah, Mr. Potter, my dear boy, I've been expecting your for a while now. Come in, come in. Have a seat and relax." The old man ushered. Harry just stayed where he was, arms crossed over his chest,

"I heard you know something about my parents?" Harry questioned, itching to find out and return to the dark-haired man that needed him, "If you don't mind I would like to make this quick. I promised Sev-…Snape that I wouldn't leave him for long." Harry stated coldly.

Dumbledore merely smiled and nodded, "I agree with you fully. Now, from what I hear is that you are- or were, excuse me- getting psychiatric assistance from Severus, is that correct?" Harry nodded, "Well, I was wondering if he ever told you about his relationship with your parents?" This time Harry shook his head. Dumbledore chuckled, "That truthfully doesn't surprise me a bit. Well, I have quite a few different things to say to you today so would you like to speak here or would you rather us converse on the way back to Severus's room?" Harry frowned,

"What is it that you need to dicuss? Doctor Dumbledore." There was a slight curiosity in his voice that Dumbledore picked up on.

"Well, I would like to talk about your parents and my relationship with them before they passed away. I also have some questions about the man you saw at Severus's door three months prior. I also would like to know how you have been faring these past couple years. And I think that is pretty much it really, unless something else arises." Dumbledore stated, petting the bright red parrot that had wandered down across his desk,"Ah, Harry. I would like to introduce you to Fawkes. Fawkes, this is Harry. Say 'hello Harry'." Dumbledore asked.

Fawkes bobbed his head up and down before finally squawking a cheery 'Hello 'Arry!' Fawkes bobbed his head some more before taking flight and landing on Harry's shoulder gently, minding his claws as he clung to the fabric on the young man's shoulder.

Harry smiled and petted Fawkes generously, "What a wonderful bird." Harry stated respectfully.

Dumbledore nodded, "Yes, yes. Fawkes is indeed. I've had him for seven years now. Never betrayed me once." He said proudly. He stretched out his arm and Fawkes instantly flew over and landed on his arm. The old man pulled out a cracker and handed it to him, whispering kind words while doing so. He set the large bird down on his stand before turning back to Harry, "Well then, I think I would like for us to take a walk. My joints need the exercise." He explained. The wiser man opened the door and let Harry pass out into the hallway before locking the office door and following him.

They made their way slowly down the hall, Dumbledore with a faraway expression in his eyes, "You know…I was there when Lily and James got married and I also attended their funerals, when they died," Dumbledore's voice soured just a bit, "They were wonderful people, those two. They had a beautiful life ahead of them, tons of potential that will never be recognized," He paused when he noticed Harry had stopped following him, "Is something wrong, Harry?"

"You blame me, don't you." Harry whispered through clenched teeth, it was more of a statement than that of a question.

Dumbledore's eyes widened and he shook his head, "Of course not, Harry. There is nothing for me to blame you for. I was merely speculating is all. I guess a doctor's approach to this conversation isn't helpful after all, eh?" He chuckled but frowned when Harry didn't react, "Now now, Harry. If you don't want to talk about your parents then I won't-"

"How did you meet them?" Harry interjected, voice neutral.

Dumbledore sighed and brought his hand to his beard, stroking it thoughtfully, "I met your mother when she interned here a long while back. She was already dating James when she came so I met him soon after that…why, is that anything important?" Dumbledore asked.

Harry shook his head and finally looked up at him again, "No, that is the only reason I left Snape to come talk to you. Now if you'll excuse me I have a place to be." He walked passed, pressing the down button on the elevator. Dumbledore followed him but remained silent.

The elevator arrived and Harry pressed one of the buttons, urging himself to stay upright and calm during their trip down. He would not show weakness in front of this man. He did not trust this man at all. He was too blunt, too eager to talk about people now dead. Harry was not ready for this kind of confrontation with emotions still raw from the experience itself.

The teen was jarred out of his thoughts when the elevator started to descend. He gripped the metal side bar tightly, biting his bottom lip till it nearly bled to keep from crying out or collapsing. If Dumbledore noticed anything he didn't comment on it.

The two males walked down the pristine hallway and Harry was beginning to wonder where the man was going or if he was following him to continue their previous conversation. Harry didn't like the second idea so he stopped and faced the other man, "Why are you following me sir? I thought our conversation was over." Harry questioned hotly.

The old man stared at him before breaking out in a smile, "Why, I'm going to visit dear old Severus. I haven't really had a chance to see him since he arrived and I'm free now. Best not waste an opportunity like this one." Dumbledore explained. They arrived at Severus's room, Harry opening the door, albeit as little harshly and lead their way inside. Dumbledore didn't at all seem perturbed by the brunette's behavior and calmly followed him inside.

Harry took his familiar place next to Severus's hospital bed and Dumbledore watched in silent amazement at how tender and gently he talked to Severus, explaining his absence. Old, pale lips cracked in a smile, "You really love him don't you?" Dumbledore asked softly, pulling up an extra chair on the other side of the bed. Harry's head shot up and he looked at Dumbledore aghast,

"Y-You…what makes you think that?" Harry questioned, looking down to hide that unmistakable blush on his cheeks.

Dumbledore chuckled, "I was young too once, believe it or not," He retorted, smiling as Harry stifled a laugh, "I fell in love with a man. His name was Grindewald. He was one of the best doctors during his time. I was lucky enough to catch his attention. He apprenticed me and taught me many skills that they do not bother to teach you in college." Dumbledore's eyes sparkled dangerously and Harry wondered just what these "skills" were exactly. He remained silent and Dumbledore continued, "We were together, romantically, for a while when he got involved with the wrong kind of people. They…corrupted him so to speak, and he became forever distanced from me after that. His patients just suddenly started dying and not once did anyone consider deceit or malpractice, no one, except me. I confronted him about it and…" Dumbledore paused, eyes closing as he battled inwardly to get his thoughts into words, "and he assaulted me. I…I had no choice, it…it was either him, or me. But still to this day, I sometimes wonder, what would our lives had been like if he hadn't strayed, if I had tried harder to save him from himself? I would like to think we would have lived the rest of our lives together, happy. But alas, I guess the fates did not have this planned for me or him." Dumbledore smiled sadly.

Harry stared at the older man, contemplating what he had just heard, _Why…why would he just tell me that? Does he expect me to react and spill my own heart to him? Yeah right, no chance of that happening, but I just have to know..._"Why did you tell me this?" Harry murmured, mistrust etched in his voice.

Dumbledore smiled, "It was my way of telling you that, in a sense, I know what you're going through and that if you need my assistance it is there for you to use." He stated bluntly, "But I do apologize, I figured that talking to you about your parents would help somehow, I did not mean to reawaken old wounds."

Harry sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "It's…alright. I understand your logic at least. I could never tell my story like you can." He admitted, slight admiration in his eyes as he smiled.

Dumbledore nodded, "It took time, lots and lots of time. You will get there eventually I hope." He stopped and ran a hand down Snape's multi-colored cheek, "Even he had a specially traumatizing past. I will not delve further on the matter but I don't know if you need any reassurance that he does know pain and betrayal and can help you." Harry smiled sadly,

"He's helped a lot more than he thinks, but, he never mentioned anything about his past while we were together. I guess we weren't close enough or something." Harry muttered, secretly hurt by the information but then again what could he expect? They weren't dealing with his life problems. Dumbledore shook his head, staring at Snape while speaking,

"He doesn't talk to anyone about the pain and suffering he's had to deal with so don't feel neglected, Harry." He smiled, "He's as stubborn as a mule and as determined as a charging bull, a very dangerous combination might I add." The old man chuckled.

Harry smiled sadly, "I wish…I could have prevented this, prevented all his pain and suffering." He whispered, gripping Snape's hand tightly. The grief he was feeling started to overwhelm him and he wiped his eyes with the back of a hand, "S-Sorrry, sir. I-I didn't mean to start crying." He muttered.

Dumbledore nodded his understanding, "It's alright Harry, although don't think of crying as a weakness. Even the strongest men alive cry. Even your own father cried every now and again." He stood up, stretching his worn bones, "Aaah, yes. I'm not as young as I used to be." He muttered amusedly under his breath.

Harry thought for a moment, "Um, Mr. Dumbledore, sir. Do you know who did this to him? Or why?" Harry asked. The man did seem well informed so it didn't sound like a very far-fetched idea.

Dumbledore frowned defensively, "I have my suspicions but that is for a need to know basis only. What matters now is that Severus recovers and heals properly. You have my trust Harry. You will do well to remember that." His eyes twinkled brightly before he left the room. Harry thought he left a little too quickly for someone who only had a _suspicion_.

He sighed and grumbled. Now he had even more questions than answers than when he left the room earlier that day! He shook his head of the gloom and ran a hand through his hair. Harry hated to admit it to himself but he was tired. Tired of always having to look behind his back when he went places. Tired of having this bad luck curse hang over him like the plague. He was _really _tired of having the people he cared about hurt because of him. Harry James Potter wanted his life to change. He wanted to be happy again, to live like a normal 18 year old male. Determined green eyes stared down at the man below him. There was only one thing he was sure of at that very moment. This man was the one that was going to help him accomplish his goal.

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TBC

Author's Notes:

Well, I utterly hate this chapter but it had to be done...This is what most people call a plot filler chapter...you need it to progress with the story but the author wishes it would crash and _burn _instead. Anyways, yeah. I'M SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG! I'm really beating myself up for it too. I didn't realize how long it had been since I had updated on _any_ of my stories and in response tied myself to the computer chair until I got this done. Once again, sorry.

Oh and another forewarning, school is starting up again! I know, I know, grumble all I want and that accursed date is finally lurking over the horizon. I start August 25th. Of course to counteract this depressing knowledge I decided to look up when our Christmas break would be...and I wanted to go and kill the school system for their obvious mental issues. They decided to be buttholes...and let us out...CHRISTMAS EVE! What the hell is their problem?! Are their calendars screwed up or something?! Gah...alright, my rant is over...it's not like it would change anything.

Wow, this is one long author's note. Thank you so much for reading this far!

If you would please, review!

Momo


	9. Log 9

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Harry Potter, just my little plot!**

Review Replies:

_lady firefox_: I can't believe I made such a careless mistake! I don't even know where that came from! I mean, brown?! Sheesh, well I'm glad your sharp eyes caught that for I would have hated for that to have stayed there unnoticed. Thanks a lot!

_JWOHPfan_: Thanks for the review! I'm sorry that it took so long for me to update!

_Christina-Marie-35_: Thank you! I'm glad you think so!

_jennadancer (anonymous reviewer)_: Thanks! I'm glad that you think my plot is unusual since I tried my hardest to come up with something that, to my knowledge, hadn't been done before.

_mywayornoway_: Glad you think so!

_Serpent91_: Thank you so much for the review! I really appreciate all the reviews you leave for me so I hope you enjoy this update!

_Narias_: Ah! You are the first person in 2009 to leave a review for this story! Kudos to you! I hope I updated quickly enough for you.

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Well, I hope that you all enjoy this next installment in The Logs!

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Chapter 9

Harry smiled as he stepped into Dumbledore's grand office, settling down in his favorite chair as he was offered a cup of tea. Fawkes swooped down and rubbed his cheek with his beak as a sign of greeting, drawing forth a laugh from the emerald-eyed teen, "Hello to you too, Fawkes." Harry stated. The parrot bobbed its head before taking flight to land on his floor stand over by the office window.

Dumbledore smiled at the show and took a sip of his own drink, "He's grown attached to you over the last few weeks." He chuckled, "I'm starting to get a little jealous from the behavior, actually." He let a crocodile tear slide down his face. Harry just rolled his eyes, already used to the Doctor's odd behavior,

"Sure, sure." He sighed, turning to look out the grand office window. Storm clouds had started to develop and swell along the horizon, making their way painfully slow towards the hospital, "There's going to be a storm tonight." He informed, resting his chin on his palm, "Looks really bad too, do we have any back-up generators in case the power goes off?" he asked, planning ahead for the worst possible outcome.

The old man smiled and waved him off, "Of course, my dear boy. This is a hospital! Backup generators are an absolute must!" His eyes twinkled and he stared out the window himself, "Does look pretty bad though, I should probably inform the patients about the inclement weather." He sighed and turned to face the younger male again, "How are things going, Harry? I've heard that you are getting along with the other patients now that you have been given permission to roam around."

Harry just shrugged. Sure, he had been staying at the hospital for three months but that didn't mean that everyone was friends with him. He'd wandered around a bit and had ended up in some random meeting area in which he was bombarded with questions from old and young alike. It seemed that not everybody had forgotten the police investigation or his ever present scar. Of course, there _were_ a few people that took the time to actually get to know him and not his past.

Harry had met them while he was trying to return to Severus's hospital room. Both were interns who were working at the hospital as nurses. One was a red-haired, speckled man named Ron and the other a brunette named Hermione. They were on their break, enjoying their meal when he had accidentally tripped over an unused IV stand near the middle of the hallway. Ron, as he soon found out later, burst out in laughter as Hermione had rushed over to see if he was okay. Harry had laughed coldly and shrugged it off, ready to make his exit in case they decided to ask him annoying questions as well.

He knew they had recognized him by the way their eyes widened and also by how their mouths dropped slightly. He grimaced, standing up and brushing himself off, "Sorry for the trouble, well I really must be going…" he muttered.

Ron raised his arm, blocking his way as he tried to move past, "You're Harry Potter, right?" he asked. Harry sighed and nodded, waiting for the barrage of questions that were sure to come, "Oh, alright then. Maybe we'll see you around, yeah? The name's Ron Weasley and this is my girlfriend Hermione. Take care, yeah?" The couple turned and walked away down the pristine hall, leaving behind a confused Boy-Who-Lived.

Then, Harry had seen them a couple of days later and they smiled over at him, taking the time to walk over and greet him cordially, "Hey! You're still here? Well, not that that's a bad thing of course but is the person you are seeing really ill?" Ron asked. Hermione bashed him in the ribs,

"Don't mind him; he's sort of insensitive sometimes." She smiled, "How are you feeling today? Would you like to get something to eat? We were about to take our break and we wouldn't mind some extra company." She offered.

Just as Harry was about to reply another nurse appeared, pen and paper in hand, "Hey! You're that Harry Potter guy who's parents were murdered, right? Would you mind giving me an autograph? I would really appreciate it!" He laughed ecstatically; not noticing the way Harry trembled and shook with barely controlled rage.

He barely had time to react before Hermione slapped him square across the cheek, "How dare you! Making his pain in to some kind of publicity stunt, you should be ashamed! Get out of my sight before I report you!" She ordered, sincerely offended by the man.

Harry stared at the woman, wide-eyed, as the other nurse scrambled off down the hall. Ron grinned proudly from ear to ear, walking up to hug her fondly, "That was bloody awesome! Good going Hermione!" He laughed as she blushed scarlet,

"W-Well that was rude and insensitive and…and," She turned to face Harry, "I'm so sorry for how stupid that nurse was. I-I've never seen so much ignorance in all my life, really! Asking for your autograph as if you were a celebrity or something!" She paused and blushed brightly again as Harry burst out in laughter, clutching his stomach tightly,

"I-I, I'm sorry! It's just…that was the first time a stranger slapped someone for my benefit before. I've never felt so happy." Tears started running down his from laughing too hard. Ron placed his arm around Hermione's shoulder and scratched the back of his head,

"Well, that's what friends are for right?" He grinned.

Harry had faltered then, laughter dying out on his lips. Friends…? How long- how long had it been since he had had friends? A warming sensation spread throughout his chest, "Friends…" he'd whispered softly. The dark-haired man smiled brightly, "Yeah!"

Ron wrapped his free arm around Harry's shoulder, "Now then, I don't know about your guys but I'm so hungry that I can eat a horse!" He led them along down the hall, prattling on about how he was going to eat so much he was going to hurl.

Harry smiled slightly at the memories and blushed when Dumbledore gave him a knowing look, "What?" he muttered.

"Nothing, nothing." Dumbledore laughed, "It's just you've been in thought for the last ten minutes. I was wondering if you had lapsed into a coma as well since you never once heard me call your name." He instantly regretted that comment when Harry's mood fell considerably, "I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it." Harry muttered, "I should get going now. I promised Severus I would be back as soon as possible." He rose from his chair and raised a brow as Dumbledore rose with him, "Are you going to escort me downstairs again? I'm pretty sure I got the layout of this hospital down already." Harry retorted sourly.

Dumbledore glowed, "Why, Harry. I'm getting the feeling that you are getting weary of my ever joyful presence!" He smiled, "Won't you satisfy this old man's desire to merely walk you back to your room?"

Harry glared for a moment before rolling his eyes and shrugging noncommittally, "Fine, fine. You don't need to get all emotional about it. I don't see what the big deal about it is though. It's just a walk."

"Ah, but you are mistaken m'boy. It is the simple fact that it is a walk as you say that makes it so desirable for a man of my tender age." The old man's eyes twinkled, "When, at all possible do you think I am able to take these jolly little strolls through my own hospital? I dare say not enough!" His eyes saddened considerably and he took on a dejected expression, "I'm always locked away in that office, toiling away on paperwork and the like with nary a single person excluding Fawkes to speak to. Your visits are a blessing!"

Harry paled when he realized that he actually felt sorry for the bearded man. He was such a softie for sappy stories and Dumbledore used that to his advantage all the time. He groaned, opening the door for the both of them.

When the two men exited the elevator they were greeted by a frantic Ron, who skidded to a stop when he found them, running down the perpendicular hallway to the left of them, "Sorry, Harry no time to chat now, have a problem to deal with." He ran around them and farther down the hall before turning into one of the patient rooms.

Harry and Dumbledore stared at each other before following the red-head. When they reached the room, they were stunned by what they saw.

Hermione was sprawled out on the floor, covered in what appeared to be that evening's dinner, gaping as an old lady brandished her cane and was swinging it around wildly, "Here I am, about to die here and you can't even get my dinner order right?! What kind of hospital is this?! _I_ was around when children were taught discipline and manners and were gifted with the ability to pay attention! I told you, I wanted the chicken wings with a side of mashed potatoes! Not clam chowder and carrots!" She brought her cane down in a huff, "Isn't there anyone here who cares enough to get my order right the first time?!" she screeched, face turning red from the exertion.

Ron put up his hands in front of him, making his way slowly towards the enraged woman, "Ma-Ma'am, please, we are sorry for the mix-up! P-Put down your cane and we can get this all figured out calmly and efficient-" Ron was cut off as the woman whirled around to face him, cane swinging around and nearly bashing him in the head,

"Listen here young man, I don't need a scalawag like you telling me what to do! I am perfectly capable of figuring out what I need and don't need to do!" She shouted, causing Ron to yelp and back up.

Dumbledore opened his mouth to introduce himself but Harry beat him to it by stepping forward and holding out his hand, "Ma'am, my name is Harry Potter. Would you mind setting down your cane for a moment? I would really appreciate it." Harry smiled kindly, not moving as he waited for a response. The woman stared at him critically, eyeing him up and down,

"Very well, young man, but don't get any funny ideas. I won't hesitate to defend myself." She threatened, lowering her cane slowly and sat down stiffly at the edge of her hospital bed. Harry smiled disarmingly and dropped his hand,

"Thank you very much. Do you mind if I pull up a chair Ms….?"

"Delvinson. Jannete Park Delvinson." The lady stated proudly, hiking up her chin. Harry pulled up a chair and sat down on the edge,

"Now, what seems to be the problem Ms. Delvinson?" Harry asked, picking up what he guessed to be Hermione's memo pad and pen, off of the floor.

"Oh, my, call me Jannete. Ms. Delvinson is so formal." She smiled, showing off her crooked teeth.

"Jannete, what seems to be the problem?"

"Well, it seems this incompetent brat," She pointed to Hermione, "messed up my dinner for tonight and now I've had to wait an extra twenty minutes just to have another incompetent brat come in to bark orders at me!" She whined, glaring disdainfully at the red-haired man, "I'm at the age now, young man, where I have very little time left to live. I would appreciate some sort of concern and recognition from these people at the very least!"

Harry nodded in agreement, jotting down what she said word for word, "I shall personally reprimand these two for you and make sure that they get the proper training to better equip your needs. Now, shall I get your dinner for you or would you rather me stay?"

She waved her right hand dismissively, "Oh no, I couldn't possibly make you go all the way down to the cafeteria for little ol' me." She cooed, "Make him do it." She pointed at Ron, voice serious.

Harry turned to face him, making sure his face couldn't be seen by the irate woman, "Mr. Weasley, go down to the cafeteria and get this nice lady her meal. If you are not back in ten minutes I will personally see to it that you are reprimanded even more so than you already will be." He snarled, before giving a discreet wink in his direction.

Ron got the hint and jumped up off the floor, nodding his head, "Yes sir, sorry sir." He rushed out of the room.

Harry turned and proceeded to engage the old lady in small talk while waiting for her food to be prepared and delivered. He kept his voice neutral and airy, never once giving her the impression that he was annoyed or busy. She seemed to enjoy it and prattled on about the family that never visited her anymore,

"…and my grandson and his new wife moved to Spain after that so they never visit, or call for that matter. My youngest granddaughter is traveling abroad to Japan to finish her college course in Japanese culture and heritage. She is doing so well." The woman stated proudly. She leaned forward, motioning for him to get closer, "Don't tell anyone this, but she is my personal favorite. I love them all but she was the one that I really connected with. I mean, sure we don't see each other that much anymore but when we finally do get to see each other it was like we were never apart." Her eyes clouded in memories, "Did you know she sent me an exotic plant from Japan a few months ago? It was absolutely stunning, although it died a couple days prior, poor thing. I don' think I had the proper tools to take care of it. I feel so bad." Her voice saddened.

Harry smiled softly and patted her frail hand, "You tried your best and you cared for it dearly. She would understand. I'm sure of it."

There was a loud commotion outside of her room and Ron rushed inside, carrying a steaming tray of food, "Sorry for the delay. It seemed that the cafeteria ordering system had been malfunctioning and that was why some of the orders had been messed up." He set the tray down on her rolling table next to her bed, "Is there anything else you would like?" he asked.

Jannete sniffed reproachfully, "No, now leave." She ordered. Ron nodded and made his way over to the still shocked Hermione, who had yet to move from her spot on the floor, helping her up off the floor,

"Come on, 'Mione. Let's go get you washed up and get you some new clothes. Come on." He led the silent woman out of the room and down towards the nurses' lounge.

Harry watched them leave, "Well, I better get going. If you need anything else, don't hesitate to call for Dr. Albus. He is the one in charge and will make sure your needs are met." He shook her hand.

"Thank you dear, you are the only one who had actually cared to listen to my story. I really appreciate it. Do you work here by chance?" She asked.

Harry smiled and laughed, "No, no. I am here for one of my friends."

The woman 'tut'ted her teeth, shaking her head, "What a shame, hospitals need more people like you dear. Well, I'll go ahead and let you go. Thank you Harry." She pulled the rolling table in front of her, opening the platter to reveal her chicken wings and mashed potatoes.

Harry stepped out of the room and shut her door behind him, knowing that she would want to have her privacy while eating. He saw Ron and Dumbledore talking quietly while sitting on a nearby bench and maked his way slowly over to them, "What are you two doing?" He asked suspiciously.

Dumbledore and Ron turned to look at him. Ron laughed, "Nothing, nothing. Don't worry; we weren't talking about how funny you looked sucking up to that old lady back there." He grinned at the glare he got in return, "Aww, are you offended?" he cooed, snickering.

Harry just sighed and rolled his eyes, "Whatever, at least I wasn't cowering in fear of an old lady with a cane." He grinned at the blush that appeared on the taller man's cheeks.

Dumbledore's eyes twinkled at the sight of Harry getting along with someone other than himself and Severus. He was truly worried about the younger man. Taking care of Severus was kind initially in itself but an obsession was something totally different and the fact that Harry could focus on something other than the silent man was good and needed. He cleared his throat, drawing attention to himself, "I would just like to congratulate you on how well you performed when the need arose. I was truly impressed." He chuckled.

Harry smiled slightly and rubbed the back of his head, "No problem, sir. I've dealt with people like that before so I sorta knew what to do." He mumbled humbly.

Hermione strode down the hall in a new nurse uniform and freshly cleaned from a shower, "You guys weren't waiting for me were you?" She turned and looked at Harry, admiration in her eyes, "That was remarkable Harry, I've never seen someone deal with an irate patient before with such ease and class!" She nodded her approval, "If I ever have a problem like that again, you'll be the second person I call."

"Second?" he questioned, an eyebrow raised.

"Well, Ron will be the first…" She whispered, blushing embarrassedly.

Harry and Dumbledore let out a hearty chuckle and the young couple blushed scarlet together, looking at each other nervously.

Harry was just about to make a comment when Dumbledore's pager went off. He pulled the vibrating device out of his overcoat, reading the quick message rolling across the screen. His eyes widened and he nearly broke into tears, "There's been an update with Severus. It seems that he's come out of his coma."

-----------------------------

TBC

Author's Note:

Whoo! Another update in the same month! I'm on a roll! Well, I hope this chapter lives up to expectations. Snape finally wakes up after being gone for six months and two chapters so we all must applaud and root for him to get better soon. Maybe we should send him a huge Get Well card with a bunch of rainbows and butterflies! I bet he'd like that! ...Or maybe not…

ANYWAYS, review and tell me what you think! I don't bite…I think.

Momo


	10. Log 10

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except this little plot!

**Enjoy!**

Log 10

Harry sat outside Snape's room, oblivious to the world around him. The sounds of feet rushing in and out of the room were the only thing that his mind registered successfully. The young male didn't know how long he sat there in thought when a warm hand was placed on his shoulder, jarring him out of his mind.

"He's going to be fine. His breathing has stabilized without the use of a machine and most of his normal functions are working as they should. The man has asked for no visitors but I felt that you should at least get a proper update on his condition." Dr. Pomfrey smiled kindly down at him before asking to sit down next to him.

Harry scooted over to give her room but stared in the other direction, unable to look at her at all. He had no idea what he should do with himself now. Should he leave? Should he stay and try to make things return to the way it used to be before this whole incident? Should he confess? All these thoughts were filling his mind and he felt lost in the torrent of emotions attached to them. Harry leaned forward, letting his face fall into his awaiting hands, "Thank you for the update. May I…may I see him soon?" he asked, nervousness evident in his voice.

Doctor Pomfrey sighed and leaned back against the wall, rubbing her eyes, "I'm afraid I am not able to answer that question for you. It is up to Dumbledore and Severus whether or not there can be visitors. He's in there now, discerning Snape's physical and mental condition for himself, which is why I am out here." She smiled.

Harry nodded, somewhat satisfied with that answer.

There was a sudden banging sound from the room across from them and the duo both jumped up and barged into the large room.

"What's going on in here?" Pomfrey shouted.

"Is Snape alright?" Harry shouted at the same time.

The two men looked as if they were going to tear at each other's throat any moment now. The IV machine had been knocked over, presumably Snape's doing since he was the closest one to the item. Dumbledore, who looked as livid as Snape, stepped away from the bed and brushed passed the two concerned occupants without even giving them a second glance.

Harry stepped forward as Dr. Pomfrey took off after the old man, "Snape…?" He called, nervousness and worry evident in his voice. When he got no response the young man walked over and timidly picked up the forgotten device and set it back into place next to the cot.

Harry turned and looked at Snape, "S-Snape…?" He whispered timidly, reaching out to touch his exposed hand.

The older man recoiled instantly, slapping the extended appendage away from him, "Leave Potter!" Severus shouted as loud as he could with what little voice he had, the iciness piercing Harry deeply.

The young brunette backed away instantly, unsure of what to do with himself. He didn't want to leave the man to his own devices without doctor supervision but he also didn't want to weaken his condition by staying.

"Leave!" The irate man shouted once more, voice cracking into a shrill, "Stay away from me!"

At these words Harry bit back tears as he ran out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him and leaned against it. His heart was racing as tears began to mist over underneath his glasses. That was not how he had planned their first reunion to go but he never expected for it to be as bad as it had.

The distressed teen then decided to make his way to Dumbledore's office to find out what had occurred in the man's hospital room. Throughout his entire stay at the hospital he had never once seen the old doctor lose his happy demeanor and especially not to the extent of which that had occurred in Snape's hospital room.

Harry exited the elevator on the 18th floor and made his way to the lone office down the hall. As the young man reached for the gold colored doorknob, shouting could be heard from inside the Head doctor's office, signaling that a dispute was currently taking place. Harry, curiosity taking over his judgment, leaned his ear against the smooth wood of the door and he focused intently to discern what was being discussed. Bits and pieces would make its way through the wood only when tension ran high and the people started to shout, which was becoming increasingly more common as the discussion went on.

Soon, as Harry waited, he finally could hear more of the conversation as the two occupants moved closer to the door.

"…we shouldn't keep this kind of information from him; it could become costly to do otherwise!"Harry figured this was Poppy who stated this based on way the person's tone had raised to a slight shrill.

"And tell him what, exactly? That there may or may not be a chance that he was the reason Severus was targeted? Do you know what trauma that knowledge would put him through? We aren't even sure the facts are valid!" Dumbeldore argued, his voice standing out easily.

"Well, what do you propose we do Albus? Once that vile gang finds out that Snape survived the ordeal they will definitely come back to finish the job. As heartless as it sounds, it would be the wisest course of action on their part."

Harry's eyes widened, _They were going to come back_, he thought, _They were going to try and kill Snape again!_

The argument seemed to have come to a standstill. There was not another sound until footsteps could be heard heading towards the door.

Harry instinctively jumped back and moved as far away from Dumbledore's office as time allowed before schooling his face to hid his emotion as Poppy opened the door. He pretended to walk forward and look up in surprise, "Doctor! What a surprise! I was just about to check in on Albus." He smiled innocently as if to prove his point, "Is he available at the moment?" Harry asked.

Poppy eyed him apprehensively for a moment before moving aside to let him in, "Is there something specific you needed? We were discussing something important." She closed the door, following him as he headed over to Dumbledore's oak desk.

Harry smiled at her sadly, "I promise to be quick." He sat down in one of the available arm chairs in front of the Head doctor's desk, "Dumbledore." Harry nodded in greeting.

Dumbledore nodded in return, automatically offering lemon drops as was his habit. "Harry, my dear boy, what is it? Nothing dire I hope." He joked and chuckled, although the merriment never seemed to reach his eyes.

Harry shook his head. "I just wanted to make sure that everything was alright with Severus. I…I wasn't able to talk to him for very long so I wanted to know if you could tell me anything." He said.

Dumbledore glanced over at Poppy for a moment before smiling brightly, "Well, physically Severus is going to heal up nicely. As far as mentally we won't know for sure yet until we get another chance to evaluate him. I hope you won't take it personally if he is somewhat cold to you though. After what he's been through I doubt that he is ready to make connections with people just yet."

Harry smiled thinly, "Yeah, I know what you mean." He closed his eyes for a minute and sighed before rising out of his chair, "I'm going to go and clear my head for a bit so I'll be back soon. Okay?"

Dumbledore smiled and nodded, "Take your time and if anything happens we will be sure to let you know."

SHshSHshSHshSHshSHshSH

Harry wandered the hospital halls aimlessly looking for something, anything that could tell him the answers to his questions. He had been walking for a long time and people had begun to worry as he passed them by for the second or third time that hour.

Ms. Delvinson spotted him as she was returning from her treatment session and waved him over. Harry hesitated at first but figured that there would be no harm in conversing with the lonely woman. He walked over and greeted her cordially as he followed her into her new hospital room.

(After the dinner incident she was moved to a nicer room as a form of apology from Dr. Dumbledore himself.)

The aging patient sat down gingerly onto her bed, Harry helping her by positioning her pillows comfortably and fixing her covers once she was settled.

"Thank you Harry. Now, tell me your troubles." She said, smiling kindly.

He looked up at her as he was moving a chair over near her bed, surprise written all over his face, "How…?" Harry started but quickly cut off as he shook his head. There was no point in asking her how she knew as it was just one of those gifts that came with old age. He sat down in his chair and smiled sadly, "My…my friend came out of his coma today."

Ms. Delvinson smiled, "Why, that's wonderful my dear! But, why do you look so sad on such a wondrous occasion?" she said, her smile quickly turning into a frown.

Harry laughed sadly and scratched the back of his head, "Well, actually…" he said, "He…he wasn't…" He frowned, trying his hardest to bottle up the emotions that wanted to run amuck inside him, "He wants nothing to do with me anymore!" Against his wishes tears started to freefall down his cheeks as his face fell into his hands, crying unashamedly in front of a woman he barely knew, "I…I don't know what to do! I don't know what to do anymore!"

A bony hand patted the top of his head gently, letting him work out his frustrations before offering support, "Now now, honey. Here, blow your nose." Jeannette said. He took the tissue and blew, sniffling slightly afterward.

"I hate this about me. I hate how I cry all the time. How nothing can ever go right for me. Why…why do I have to act like such a child?" he asked, knowing he was acting like a selfish brat but could do nothing to stop the flow of emotions.

Ms. Delvinson chuckled softly as she rubbed the top of his head, "You know, you remind me of when I was a young teen myself. Always afraid to say what I mean, hiding behind a façade of happiness and trying to act like there was nothing wrong with my life." She paused, eyes closing as she thought about what she was saying,

"But in truth, I was suffocating. All the desires of other people took precedence over what I felt or wanted. I assure you that you aren't acting like a child, Harry. You are being human. You have what most adults these days would die for. You have courage. You have the courage to face the struggles presented to you and you have the courage to cry, not only for yourself, but for the benefits of others. Most people would call that childish, yes, but honestly, what do they know? Children see the world for what it is; even if they don't always realize it themselves. They are the real adults of this world. They aren't the ones who sugarcoat everything and hide behind false pretenses…" She stated, tensing as she realized what she was doing, "Oh… what am I doing rambling on like this? I really am getting old aren't I?" She said, smiling as tears started to crawl down her cheeks as well.

Harry smiled his first true smile ever since everything went wrong in his life. A chuckle grew in his throat and soon turned into a full blown laugh, tears all the while streaming down his face, but for once they were happy tears.

They stayed like that for a while, both of them laughing and crying together as if the two had solved all the world's greatest problems and to Harry, they really had. He felt that he could finally start being happy with himself again.

Harry wiped his eyes with his sleeves and smiled, "You know, you have a lot of courage yourself, facing this world on your own." He said.

Jeannette grinned, "Ah, but that's not true is it? I have my family with me, even the ones that I won't see again for the rest of my life. I have them to keep me going, even when life tries to keep me down." She laughed, patting his hand, "And I now have you to keep me going as well. So don't fret, my child. Everything happens for a reason."

Harry smiled, "Yes, of course." He held her hand tightly, savoring this bond that had developed between them.

"Now," Ms. Delvinson continued, "About this friend of yours. It seems to me that he must be feeling very frightened and alone in this world right now. I think he could probably use a true friend who could look past his cold demeanor and help him feel safe again. Don't you?" she asked.

Harry frowned, "But wouldn't that be going against his wishes? He really seemed like he meant it when he told me to never see him anymore." His voice dropped a little as he said the last part.

Jeannette sighed, tilting her head to the side, "Well, that is up to you to decide. I may not be his friend but I know what I would be feeling right now to wake up in such a place with no recollection of how I got there or what was happening." She smiled, "I'm sure that no one would want to go through that trauma alone."

Realization dawned on him and Harry stood up sharply, hugging her briefly before running to the exit, "Thank you very much for your time! I promise never to forget you!"

He was halfway down the hall when he heard, "Good luck, Harry!" echo down the halls after him. Harry stopped at the elevator but quickly kept going since he knew it would take too long for him to get to the 14th floor. He tore down the stairwell often jumping down the last few steps to make up time.

It took him two minutes for him to get from the 17rd floor to the 14th and nearly bumped into Dr. Pomfrey who was making her way down the hall when he busted through the door, "Harry? What's wrong?" She called.

"I'm going to help Severus!" He shouted over his shoulder, gasping as he tried to regain enough oxygen into his lungs.

Dr. Pomfrey frowned and shouted, "But Harry he doesn't want any visitors! You aren't allowed in there anymore!"

Harry ignored her and reached the end of the hall; placing his key card into the slot and busting open the door.

He didn't know what to do after that. He just stared at the man, breathing sharply as he tried to regain his breath. He closed the door behind him quickly and dragged a chair over next to the bed before sitting down and staring at the floor.

Snape regarded him coldly, "I told you to get out Potter." He rasped, "I don't ever want to see you again!"

Harry winced as the words cut through his heart and clenched his fists, whispering, "No."

Snape became livid. He picked up the plastic cup of water on his nightstand and threw the cup of water at Harry. The cup barely missed the young man's face but the water inside the cup found its intended target, drenching the young man's head, "What part of get out don't you understand- aargh!" He gasped and gripped his shoulder as pain ripped through him like a knife.

"Severus!" Harry exclaimed, getting up to see if he was okay and ignoring the fact that he was soaked with water he reached over to touch him but was once again deflected by Snape's hand. Harry reached out again and this time caught the hand that was meant to deter him, holding on as if it was his only lifeline, "I'm not going to leave you again! I know you're scared, I know that, but I also know that you are lonely too! I need you to know that I'm here for you! That I will protect you!" He pleaded.

"You think I need your protection? I don't need a damn thing from you Potter. I'm not some pathetic weakling that needs to be coddled!" Snape shouted hoarsely, "I'm perfectly fine on my own!"

Harry let go of his hand, stepping back away from the bed, a sorrowfully twisted smile on his face, "You know, you sound just like me, pretending that you're perfect and that it's the world that is flawed but, what will you do? What will you do when the nightmares start? When you wake up screaming for help but no one is there to help you because you've isolated yourself from everyone? I've been there Severus; I know what it's like and what you are going through now. Even you know that!" Harry admonished.

Snape looked away and stared fiercely at the far corner of the room, acting as if he had heard nothing. The only reason Harry knew he had gotten through to him at all was through the fact that Snape's body had started to tremble slightly as he tried to hold back his emotions.

Harry sat down on the edge of the bed and reached out, with no resistance this time, to hold the frail man in a gentle yet reassuring embrace, letting the older man rest his head against his chest. He felt the tremors become more pronounced and knew that the man had finally let the silent tears of emotions flow out of his body.

The brunette didn't know how long he'd been holding the man but was surprised to feel trembling hands latch onto the back of his shirt, digging their nails into the fabric as a sign of acceptance. He looked down and smiled feeling his own emotions boil over and his own tears starting to slide down his cheeks as he made a silent prayer,

_Thank you, thank you for bringing him back to me…_

_

* * *

_TBC

Author's Note: 1 YEAR! It's been one year since my lazy ass decided to write something again. I deserve all forms of creative punishment, I know, but at least I finished this chapter before I died. I don't know if anyone cares about this story anymore but oh well, I'm still writing it!

Review if you want! It would make my day!

Thanks,

Momo


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